Engagement Party Ideas, Etiquette, Gifts, Games, and Favors

So you find yourself throwing an engagement party? Here are some great ideas, gift suggestions, etiquette, games and favors to get your juices flowing.

The Invitations
How about a paper doll invitation? Using part clip art and part photos of the bride and groom, the front side shows them in street clothes (or undies if they have a good sense of humor!) and the inside has cutout wedding clothes.

Peas and carrots, peanut butter in jelly or Fred Astair and Ginger Rogers. Select something that goes well together and photocopy it onto the front of the invitation. Use a circle cutter to remove the faces. On the inside of the card, photocopy the couple so that the faces are under the cutout section.

The Decorations
Make sure you get lots of embarrassing photos of the bride and groom and have posters made at your local print shop.

Plastic wedding cake toppers can be purchased at a party supply store for a cute center piece. Create cardboard wedding cakes and get as elaborate as you can get!

If you have a bit of money in your budget, spring for novelty veils and bow ties for all your guests.

Gift Ideas
Unless you have a bottomless pocket, we suggest you go light on the engagement gifts. Remember - you still have the shower and the actual wedding to spring for. Not to mention travel expenses, new attire, etc.

Gifts that will help the couple plan and organize their wedding will be much appreciated. If you are technically inclined, setting the couple up with a wedding web site would be a smash hit - especially if they are not!

A subscription to a bridal magazine is a great gift idea for the bride. How about a book on relationships written by a reputable author?

Some Games to Break the Ice
Since many of the people in your life will now be seeing a lot more of each other, some games to break the ice may be in order. With the showers, bachelorette and bachelor parties and the wedding itself, your friends will appreciate taking the time to know one another.

See our "Shower Games" article for some ideas.

The Favors
You have everyone in the same place. Why not pass out some save the date reminders? Magnets or stickers will be put to use. Candies wrapped in a cute fabric are very easy to make and affordable. Create a label with your wedding date (or month) and pass them out. Keep a bunch in a bowl by the front door so everyone will grab one on the way out.

My friends' engagement card was a postcard from a museum where they took the facs out of Adam and Eve with an Xacto knife and pasted color copies of their faces beneath. It turned ut really cute.

I love the idea about passing out save the date reminders at the reception.

I meant the engagement party. Ooops!

We had a great engagement party! We had a mulitple celebration - Our engagement, housewarming, my birthday (the following day) and my fiancee got a great new job!! We had a Mexican theme and even had a pinata. Everyone had fun and we got to meet one another's friends who we hadn't met yet in a casual, fun environment.

These are all great ideas! I am going to use them for two weddings I am helping to plan. Thanks

I just got engaged and am looking for really fun and cute "ring" favors for my upcoming engagement party. Any suggestions on give out or make ?

I'm having an engagement party and need creative ideas on how to announce my wedding party. I would like to give something to each guest, but have the wedding party be different. The intent is that the wedding party doesn't know yet. Any help would be great. Thank you.

A friend sent all of her bridesmaids the Wedding Planner dvd to announce that they would be a part of the wedding party. I thought this was a very cute idea!

A friend sent all of her bridesmaids the Wedding Planner dvd to announce that they would be a part of the wedding party. I thought this was a very cute idea!

We're (my fiance and I) are planning a pretty big engagement party (100 ppl). I'm really searching for some creative ideas. I love the one's I've seen so far (Save the date, posting embarrasing pictures), got anymore. It's in a month from now. Thanks

We are having our engagement party at a park. We are going to do the pincic theme. I love your party ideas. More would be great.

We're having our engagement party at a lake with BBQ, music, and our closest friends and family. Not really my idea, but the fiance really wanted to have it in an outdoorsy kind of atmosphere. But I am adding my own touches, I am going to hang string of lights with multi-colored shades on them from tree to tree, I am going to have tables with candles on them although they will probably have to be the kind that repel bugs. It is in July so we can go swimming or fishing while there and we are going to make it a little weekend campout for our loved ones. Any other ideas to maybe add a little bit of a feminine touch to this kind of atmosphere?

My fiance had a great idea for where to have our engagement party - He suggested the place where we had one of our first dates way back in high school. We had it in a little old-fashioned ice cream parlor & it was just perfect. We gave out little ice cream cone magnets with our names and the date so our guests could always remember that special day. We are getting married a year from now - May 2004.

I am going to an engagement party and I want to know how much I am suppose to spend on a gift. ..or what type of gift i should get. Is a new grill too much?

I NEED FAVOR IDEAS FOR AN ENGAEMENT PARTY OF 50....ALSO ANY UNIQUE DECORATING IDEAS.....DIFFERENT GIFT IDEAS ALSO....ANY HOW I JUST NEED SOME IDEAS...PLEASE !!!

I'm having my engagement party this weekend. My fiance gave me a tiffany solitare ring and got the whole engagement party theme from there. I sent out small white jewelry boxes to my close friends and family and enclosed a (tiffany green) rope in a knot. We paste the info and directions on the other side of the box (lid) saying.. "Les finally propossed and Luciene said what took you so long?" Please join us in our Engagement Party! I received so much calls appreciating the creativity of the invitation. For the Party, I ordered 2 layers of cake, looking like 2 boxes stacked up in FONDANT matching the tiffany box I received complete with large white chocolate bow on top!!! I saved money talking to the baker charging me for 2 different size of REGULAR cake instead of charging me for wedding cakes. For my favors, I ordered white ring boxes in the internet and I put chocolate truffles inside the boxes and tied them in my color of satin ribbons, it look so cute!!! additionally, I wrapped all my plastic utensil in large napkins and tied them in my color of ribbon as well just to give more kick to the party. I am having my party at a popular Estate. I save money talking to them for just renting the GARDEN instead of the whole facility. Linens, tables and umbrellas are provided!!! As for the centerpiece I bought potted flowers at a local home improvement store so that we can take them home and plant it in our garden after the party and as a keepsake. I also bought faux flower petals and silver rings to scatter around the tables. To save even more, I just ordered my food at Boston Market and I'm just bringing extra fruits, cookies/brownies and snacks for the kids. Hope some of these ideas would help you ladies in your future plans. I can't wait to plan my wedding!!!!!

GOOD LUCK TO YOU ALL AND CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

We are (fiancee and I ) planning on having around 200 friends and family for our engagement party. It is going to be at my house in a beautiful tent, with a dance floor, entertainment, servers ect.. However, we are not planning on getting married till August of 2005. We were not able to set a definate date, due to the fact that the church doesn't have their books ready for that year. So, do I have to opt for party favors, considering we don't have a date?? Please let me know what you think??

My fiance & I were hoping for a rather small engagement party to be held at my parents' place with approx 30 guests. Unfortunately, the guest list has exploded to 50, and we are having problems seating all the guests indoors (as it's winter over here, and too chilly to sit outside)..

My thought on this is - never let your parents get involved with your planning :P They will end up inviting some 20 odd extra people - whom you don't even know!

Also, with favours, I bought some cheap tulle from the craft shop in a bright deep pink colour (fuchsia pink), put chocolates in squarish cuts of fabric, and tie up with a ribbon & a tag from us. This doesn't involve too much effort at all!

Table centers are easy, I got some silver bowls cheap (approx 3.00 each) and am just filling them up with some colourful fruits - strawberries, cherries, grapes and placing them in the center. These double as part of dessert later - (together with some baked products I'm buying from the shops) :)

My very good friend's fiance wants to propose to her, but he wants it to be a suprize. Every Friday night we (all of our friends) go out to a local bar. He doesn't want anyone to know what he is about to do except him, my husband and myself. He really wants this to be special for her because she just got out of an abusive relationship. If you have any suggestions please feel free to e-mail me at... smithc@bigriver.net

He is going to pop the question on July 4th, 2003

The D.J at the bar is in on this too and is going to help anyway he can. ANY IDEAS?

I'm planning an engagement party for October. Its going to be held at my home and there will be about 30 to 40 guests. Any suggestions what I can do for seating?

My wedding date is for Sept 05, but i wanted to have an engagement party this coming October is this a correct time to have an engagement party?

Hi , I'm getting engaged at the end of this month and am now getting the party planned, decoration ideas, and also how much 60 people will eat and drink.. these sights are great ! good luck to all fellow brides to be...

I am having a small, casual engagement party this Saturday. The party consists of 30 close family members and friends. I would like to give them all something as a favor, but I have a limited budget. ANY helpful, creative suggestions would be appreciated. I am a young bride (22) and would appreciate any help from older, wiser women.

We are planning my engagement party, and it will be a champaigne brunch at a beautiful hotel. For the party gifts, we are giving small bottles of champaigne to each guest. We are tying a white ribbon on them with a poem written on parchment paper and cut out as a heart. The poem is still a work in progress!

Luciene -I love the Tiffany themed party! I am using those colors for my wedding so that gave me some great ideas.

My Fiance and I are having our engagement party next weekend. For favors we are having our local bakery make monogramed cookies. They will be made with bright colored Icing and will be individually wrapped

The save the date magnets are a great idea also - we dont have our date set yet so we cant use them.

My fiance and I are having our engagement party on saturday july 19th. It is at a lake, BBQ and will bhe lots of fun. Any ideas on decorations. I have done favors already with save the date stickers on the outside.

We're getting married in July of '05 and are having our engagement party this September. It's a dinner party of about 70 people. Any suggestions for entertainment? We can't afford a D.J. so we were just going to play soft dinner music ourselves. Do you think this is enough? Any suggestions?

I've been to a million baby showers where they give you a necklace made of party streamer with a pacifier as a pendant. I thought why not make it one of those fake engagement rings? The object of the game is for each guest not to say the couples names, or the words wedding or engagement for about two hours. Whoever catches someone saying it can take away the necklace! At the end of the 2 or 3 hours, the guest with the most rings gets a little gift, like candles or a frame. My guests had a great time with this. Hope that yours will too!

Hi everyone! I am seeing some great idea here! Thanks! I am matron of honor in my best friends wedding and am in the process of planning an engagement party for 50-70 in August...here is the scoop. We are having it at my club (old farm house atmosphere) and it will be a western theme. I have gone to goodwill a number of times and found cowboy boots at low low prices(1.50-5.00 a pair!). I am putting the flower arangements in the boots. On the tables with the boots I am putting beer bottles with taper candles in them for lighting (i tied raffia around some of the bottles and red gingham on others). I also got 10 pictures from the bride to be (of the groom and bride together) and took them to kinkos, made them black and white and laminated them to go on the tables as well. I picked up some forks at goodwill and will use them to mount the photos on. On the approach to the club there are two huge magnolia trees that canopy the walk...I am going to hang mason jars with tea lights from red gingham and white ribbons on the branches and have hurricane glasses lining the stairs up to the front door. I also plan on having bales of hay and some tin chickens out front. I got all the beer bottles, wine jugs and mason jars from our local recycling center. We are also going to have a photo booth set up for guests to take pics for the bride and groom. We have painted a back drop with a southwestern scene and are going to stock the booth with props (hats, bottles, toy guns, sombraros, etc) and hope for some funny pics! The back patio is for dancing and hopefully the margarita machine will inspire the guests to dance a little!! The food is tex-mex and the cake i am undecided on. There are some other things...little details i have left out...do not want to put you to sleep! Good luck to you all with your parties hope this has helped someone. Jenny

Having an Engagement Party in a few weeks. We purchased the "Save the Date" magnets and are doing a BBQ/Picnic at a local park. Informal but fun. Rather than games where everyone doesn't participate, we're giving tickets when the guests arrive (75 guests) and every 1/2 hour give away a prize/thank you gift: bottle of wine, decorated candle, dept.store gift certificates, sm.crystal frames, Bubble Bath, Gourmet coffee, beach towel, car wash coupons and movie tickets. We're also planning decorated baskets with fresh fruit on every table as the centerpiece. We're wrapping mints in tulle with personalized ribbon ("save the date") and placing in a large basket for guests to help themselves. We bought a scrap book to pass around for "Tips for the Future Bride and Groom". Last but not least...we took photo's and made a collage of pictures from babies to now. Good Luck to all of you on your parties, hope you can use some of these ideas !

Having an engagement party in a months time and it's great to find all these fantastic ideas in time. Good luck to everyone who is in the same position!!!!

My brother and his fiance are having an engagement partt in two months. Instead of spending tons of money on food and gifts for the guests they are having appetizers, wine, beer and a DJ. This way the groom's and bride's families are in an environment that isn't so tense.

Is a month enough notice to send out invites for an engagment party?

Thanks for all of your cute ideas....we'll wrap them all into one and have a great time!!!!!

I like the idea about scattering rose petals and silver rings on the table at an engagment party...does anyone know where I can buy the silver rings?

My fiance and I were thinking of an engagement party but, with both our families and our group of friends, it could be a huge event. We were thinking of throwing a casual one with our friends at a local lounge, blocking off a room for the private party, and then having a more family oriented one, obviously thrown by our parents. My mom has a slight problem because she wants to throw it, but again there will be a lot of people between both families (70 or so). She was thinking that if my fiance's mom insists on throwing one, we can have two separate ones - one with my side, and then one with his side. Does this look bad??

I love the idea about creating a posterboard and having all the guests give the young couple some engagement advice. My mother in-law to be, took the engagement party into her own hands.....she made a theme where everyone had to wear white clothes from head to toe. Funny, huh? Everyone has said something about it, but i think when it comes down to the party it will be very cool.

We are throwing a "engegement/bottle party" for my brother and his fiance. On the invite we have asked all guests to bring either a bottle or a 'bar related gift' to the couple. It is a different theme and a lot of fun .

Jenny from Alanta...thanks for the great idea...I am hosting an engagement party and the groom to be is from Texas...I will be going to good will as well!

I'm hosting a surprise engagement party for my friend who is getting married at an upscale restaurant, am I expected to pay for all the guests dinner? Or, can I put on the invitation "menu & prices attached for your convenience"

I'm having a engagement party on November 1st, the day after Holloween. I have some ideas for decorating but none for the favors. Can you help me?

My mom is hosting an engagment party for my fiance and myself. It will be on Halloween. Any suggesstions on invitation wording? We want it to be fun...there will be over 100 people, with a DJ and lots of food and beverages.

I love the idea about putting a fake engagement ring on a necklace. Where can I get a fake engagement ring?

im looking for halloween things

this is gay

Hey girls and gals~ how about answering some of the questions instead of just talking about your engagements. ~for a gift~ it is suppose to be a token gift either for the hostess or the couple for example~ a bottle of wine and CD of wedding songs. Not to spend more than 15-20 dollars. This isn't to be a party about gifts it's strickly a celebration not a shower... I have been planning events for years now and the engagement party shouldn't be frilly or expensive save that for the wedding, you wouldn't want to over do your own wedding. You can do a theme/ or color scheme that can follow through showers and into your wedding. Happy planning and remember to take time out planning the marriage not just the wedding....

PARTY FAVOR IDEAS if your creative and have a computer you can not only give save the date invitations but a bottle of wine at the same it~ Here's how Make your label on a program as easy as Word you can write anything from save this date; to a note from the bride and groom of thanks. Print it on an label paper made for the printer (found at stores like wal-Mart)Stick it to the already exsisting label (may need glue stick)and decorate with ribbions the color of your wedding. *I suggest buying wine by case it's cheaper.~$4 per bottle for white wine some liquor stores will negotiate if buying large amounts, call around. and if your on a really low budget try Boone's Farm, most people like it and it runs about 1.50 a bottle.

My partner suprised me with the date of our engagement party this week. Its a little bit nerve racking but I am really looking forward to it. I don't think it really matters what you do or how much money you spend on the party having all your family and friends together will make it special. I think we should all worry more about the fact that before we know it, it will be over. So make the most of it!!

Hey Everyone..I"m new to the site, and recently just engaged..Yesterday actually is when my boyfriend asked my father for his permission..very exciting,

My parents are throwing me a casual engagement dinner party, no DJ because we want it to be simple and not take away from our wedding. What can we do to make it more interesting and fun for the guests instead of just sitting there and eating dinner? Any ideas?

My fiance and I just got engaged. We would like to host the engagement party ourselves. Would this be proper etiquette? Also, both sides of our families don't seem to get along very well. This would definitely cause a lot of tension during the party. Does anyone have any advice? Help!

I just want your advice on some party activities thanxs

Listen up girls... This is a Q&A website...My question is why are all you broads so gay...can you answer that.? If you have a Tiffany theme...splurge for real petals and Dean and deluca, who eats at Boston Market? and you the chick with the cowboy boots...get a life!

I am planning an engagement party for my cousin, but it's a surprise for the "bride-to-be". Please help me out with what type of party favors to hand out.

I am having an engagement party for some friends that are in my wedding. I have looked through some magazines to find some themes and found some forest looking stuff and since the engagement party will be in January (a cold month) I have decided to have an Icey woodland theme. I plan to use some spray stuff that makes windows look like they are icey and put glass ice cickles ( dont know how to spell that) around the house to give it an icey look. So if your looking for some ideas just look through some magazines and maybe center your theme for the party around what your food looks like of what type of food you want.

I am throwing an engagement party for my nephew and his fiancee on Valentine's Day, which is also the groom's father and stepmother's weding anniversary. I paln to have lots of red rose petals stren around, prepare a heart cake and a molded salad in a hert shape. I hope to serve chicken filets cut in heart shapes. I am considering preparing an album for the couple with love poems and photos of them on each page - gathering photos from friends and family in advance. Favors may be a framed love poem or a heart-shaped basket filled with heart candies. I'd love to be able to get those candies with their names on them and the wedding date on some.

my friend just got engaged. who should throw the engagement party according to propper etiquette? i am glad to do it but want to do what is right.

I think everyone is wasting money on cheesy crappy details your guests will forget. Ellegance is timeless. One really nice element goes a lot further than a lot of tacky ones. And please, no fast food joints catering the affair. You only get engaged once. Make it beautiful!

As for gifts, guests should not be cheap! Fifteen or twenty dollars is pathetic! I can't believe anyone would think that was acceptable. Cash is the most appreciated gift to help the couple towards their wedding.

Inexpensive favors can be pewter frames or truffles in personalized boxes. To all those wondering where to find faux engagement rings try www.wedthings.com or www.weddingfavorites.com, they will run you about a dollar each.

Traditionally the engagement party is thrown by the brides family, however, many couples throw the party themselves.

For more information or questions please email me at fozzerina@hotmail.com. For a flat rate of fifty dollars I will help you with any wedding planning questions, including negotiating with vendors, budgets, and how and where to get the things your looking for at the best prices. You have questions, I have all the answers.

Good luck ladies!

I got engaged on Christmas eve i came across this web page hoping on some advice........ I have never been to a engagment party and i only ever been to one wedding was pretty crappy. As i am only 20 and getting married next year my engagment party is in about 3 weeks!?!?!?!

And if any one has read these forums if that's what its called there is no help what so f...ing ever. Sorry I need help as far as i have learnt i was going to buy a few cases of wine and plenty of finger foods. I am having it at my house it isn't very big, a town house with a little garden. Nothing big and nothing fancy mainly friends and a few family as it will be mainly my family at the wedding as apose to heaps of friends.

For those who have had and engagment party please HELP

Do i give gifts? What do i do to my house and i havn't alot of money atm.

It would be so much appreciated if you guys could help :P

Almost married 20 year old.

Left one thing out.... My Fiance is a web designer and he is making our invites for our engagment party does any one know a web page i can get good Pic's/Symbols to put on there????

TA

Nicole,

You're on the right track, a cocktail party (hor'dourves and coctails) is a great idea for anyone with a tight budget. Engagement parties are to introduce family and friends on both sides to one another. Let me know are you having the party outdoors or inside? For decorations you can use photo collages of the two of you (great conversation starters) candles, and balloons are all inexpensive decorations! Make sure you have a specialty cake that has your names on it. A nice touch would be to give little favors to your guests. Something as simple as candys in a pretty box or organza bag with a personalized ribbon that has your names on it is a great idea and won't cost much. If you need more halp, as it sounds you're slightly inexperienced email me. For a flat rate of fifty dollares I will be happy to answer any and all questions from the moment you sign up to the second you walk down the aisle. I have been a professional event planner for five years. I can also help you get the best prices on any favors or decorative elements you may need and also advice on planning your budget and how to negotiate with vendors.

The microsoft office website has a clip art section where you can down load images to MS Word.

Good luck let me know.

it's fozzerina@hotmail.com, see the message posted before yours.

it's fozzerina@hotmail.com, see the message posted before yours.

For some of you who are looking for ideas, I went to an informal engagement party and they had everyone write down bits of "sage" advice for the couple on pretty stationary but they signed their name only on the back. The couple then read the advice out loud for everyone and then had to guess who wrote what. It sounds sort of cheesy, but it was very touching and everyone really enjoyed it. Afterwords the couple was able to add those bits to their scrapbook/album. They also had typed the engagement story and framed it for display for the guests to read if they weren't familiar with it already.

Does anyone have any other cute ideas for asking a friend/relative to be one of your bridesmaids?

Also, what other games can be played at an engagement party??

I am throwing an engagment party for my brother and his fiance, and I am very excited! My question if anyone could help is, her family is Mexican, but my brother and his fiance are going to Mexico for their honeymoon and my idea was to throw a Mexican themed engagement party. Is this idea going to make her family uncomfortable? This is the first time our families will meet and I don't want to seem condescending (like we are "accepting" her heritage). Please help!

My fiance an I are having an "Coctail" engagement party in May. (2004). It will be elegant but simple with appetizers, cash bar, and a DJ. My favors will be a bottle of wine w/ "Save the Date" cards attached. I think thats a great idea. At this time, we want to announce the "Briday Party" in a special way. My question is, does anyone have any creative ideas for this? My entire bridal party will consist of 30 people. (large I know) I'd appreciate anyone's input! Thanks a bunch!!!

Wedding date: September 24th, 2005.

If the party size is going to be large, why not announce the bridal party like you would an Oscar winner; "and the honor of "Best Man" goes to...

Melissa, please don't have a cash bar, it's soooo tacky and many guests will be offended. It's like inviting people to your home and asking them for money as you pour them a glass of wine. It's rude.

I am planning my engagement party now and it is so difficult. I have no ideas what to do for the invites because we want it to be formal. We are having the party at a park. I don't want to give everyone a gift. Would it make my guest mad if I only gave gifts to the attendents? I would really like your opinion. Please email me at reeves_05@webtv.net Thank you.

I hope everyone here has a great party, i am getting engaged in Oct 04 and can't wait. Its so exciting planning everything!!!

I'm commenting in reply to Sarah O. -- Thursday, February 19 2004, 02:01 pm

Maybe you could through them a bon voyage theme engagement party and incorporate the whole idea of the honeymoon to Mexico, thus making it clear that it is not that he is Mexican but rather that they are taking a trip to Mexico which is being celebrated.

i agree no cash bar iwill make your guests feel disapointed and lesson your chance of a nice gift . just an idea of a wedding favor you take a pear candle and put it in a sheer gift bag and have a little card and ribon attached that say for exThomas and Jessica a perfect pear i know it sounds cheesy but it's also really cute

What games do you play or activities do you do at engagement parties?

I am having my engagement party on Saturday, and since the wedding is in December we decided to have all our guest were all white to keep the winter them going.

Any ideas on a soppy song for our dance

I am the mother of the groom. The bride's brother is hosting an engagement party in 2 weeks. Since I had never heard of an engagement party, I have found this site to be helpful. I am looking for any special ideas for some special gift from me. I like the ideas of photo collages etc. I enjoy doing various types of needlework, sewing, crafts etc. and enjoy scrapbooking. It sounds like many of you are quite creative. Have any of you or your family/friends received a gift from the mother of the groom that was especially touching? Any suggestions are welcome! Thanks!

I am the mother of the groom. The bride's brother is hosting an engagement party in 2 weeks. Since I had never heard of an engagement party, I have found this site to be helpful. I am looking for any special ideas for some special gift from me. I like the ideas of photo collages etc. I enjoy doing various types of needlework, sewing, crafts etc. and enjoy scrapbooking. It sounds like many of you are quite creative. Have any of you or your family/friends received a gift from the mother of the groom that was especially touching? Any suggestions are welcome! Thanks!

I just got engaged this past weekend :) I am looking into having an engagement party in June, but am really unsure how these are supposed to work? Would it be okay to just have a big BBQ type get together without the formalities? What am I expected to do as the bride-to-be? What about my fiance? Any advice would be great...my email is cyarhia@yahoo.com

Ive just got engaged last month. My boyfriend proposed to me on top of the Empire State Building in New York he even got down on one knee. We are having our engagement party in June and the Theme is Black and White. It was the idea of my sister who is an up and coming bridal consultant.Everybody has to be dressed in black and white and all of the decorations are going to black and white. Its going to be fab

I think a catered BBQ with a DJ at a lake sounds perfect. I noticed others were planning outdoor BBQ engagement parties, so I would like to offer an idea: customized coozies - as another option to the remember the date magnets or stickers (www.customink.com)! You can chooose pics from their photo gallery, which makes the process so much simplier. Price depends on the quantity..$1.63 for 100 is the estimate that I received. The question I have (loved the box with a truffle inside idea..but outdoors?) is: what type of gifts can you give for an outdoor engagement party?? Any ideas? ...email: madhatter135@hotmail.com

Lots of ME ME ME ME here. Good grief.

I recently got engaged (May 1, 2004), and the comments here are very helpful. Anyone has ideas about where the engagement should take place when the couple lives in two different states and has two different sets of friends? Any advise will be appreciated.

Hello to all. My engagement party is taking place in August inside a hall. Im not really into halls but this hall is placed amoungst lovely gardens and has a gazebo attached. My problem is how do you turn a boring old hall into something elegant. At the moment I cant get past fairy lights. I would love it if someone could direct me!

Hi, we are having our engagement party on the 29th May but we aren't getting married until the 23rd September 2006, is it still ok to give guests "save the date" cards so far in advance?

FOR MY DAUGHTERS SHOWER IT WILL BE BEACH THEMED AND THE BRIDESMAIDS ARE GIVING FLIP FLOPS FOR FAVORS--- SAYING THE BRIDE AND GROOMS NAME AND TIED TOGETHER WITH RIBBON SAYING THE PERFECT PAIR--- SUCH A CUTE IDEA

I was recently engaged and received a beautiful vase.Is it proper to use it, or do I have to wait until I am married?

My fiance and I are having a surprise engagement party at the lake.First we are going to have a barbaque and then serve ice cream cones. the invitations or announcements will be wrapped around the cone saying are wedding date is set for september1,04. Everyone thinks they were invited there to celebrate my birthday so they will get a fun surprise. Then we're going to the waterslides across the street!

Hi. My Fiancee just proposed to me lastnight at a BBQ infront of all our friends. It was our one year and seveth month anniversary. Im real excited about everything but I dont know how to go about haveing an engagement party. Im gonna have it a park in June. I dunno how to go about it though as in what to get and all. Could you give me some ideas? Email me at ThotLessLuvIHave@aol.com

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

This is a great site, light hearted and it is sad that even on a site like this we have miserable people who take joy away from brides. You know who you are. Leave the brides alone if you think this is gay then go away. Great Ideas Ingore the piss head. Good Luck

AGAIN-ANY IDEAS FOR A WAY TO ANNOUNCE THE BRIDAL PARTY IN A SPECIAL WAY? I'D LIKE TO DO THIS AT THE ENGAGEMENT PARTY, BUT WOULD JUST LIKE SOME SUGGESTIONS PLEASE.

I recently became engaged (May 25,2004 to be exact). I really enjoyed reaa=ding all of the comments posted on this site. They were much appreciated. It was also comforting to know that there are so many other people having the same experience as I am. Question----my fiance wants hardly anything to do with the planning of the engagement party. I am having trouble because we will be inviting approx. 100 people. I need to know what type of entertainment do you have for such a large group. Is dinner and music enough?

looking for any suggestions for wording the invitation to a drop in party to introduce our daughter and new son in law to our local friends. Is it rude to stagger the time to accommodate like groups of guest.

Hi,

My friend is getting married and is hosting an engagement party. She and her fiance registered at several large department store. Many of these items they registered are over the $100.00 mark. They expect at least 400people at their wedding. She is also having a Bridal Shower. Is it common to register for an engagement party? It looks tacky on there part...they're asking for garage door openers and lawn mowers too?

Hi,

My friend is getting married and is hosting an engagement party. She and her fiance registered at several large department store. Many of these items they registered are over the $100.00 mark. They expect at least 400people at their wedding. She is also having a Bridal Shower. Is it common to register for an engagement party? It looks tacky on there part...they're asking for garage door openers and lawn mowers too?

Newly engaged and very excited about the engagement party, it's on July 17th. We are having it at a hall, keeping it casual, @ 100 people attending. For favors, my mother special ordered M&Ms with our names and the date we got engaged printed right on the candy and she tied them up in little heart shaped fabric bags, they weren't expensive and they came out really cute. We do not have a date for our wedding as of yet, is it OK to tell guests Summer of 2006? This is what we are shooting for but we need time to save.

One of my friends is also having an engagement party and rumor has it has also registered for this. I find this to be in extremely poor taste. If you want to have an informal celebration, then great, but to expect gifts for everything, gah!

In my opinion Amalia seems to be a very rude person whom believes she is a bit better than others. You should not put down others because you do not agree with their ideas. If you are such a hot shot planner then why are you playing on the computer. I think everyone's ideas are fine.

We shouldn't put anybody down here. We should be all here for the same reason and that is to get advice from other brides about planning and ettiquette issues. With that being said, I hope this doesn't sound GAY or RUDE but we are having a potluck engagement party for about 30 pp at my fiances parents home in 11 days. We will send out written invitations which you can get from Savon or Party City. No need for preprinted invitations. We will ask everybody to bring a favorite dish to share, and we will go over the wedding details since our wedding is in 55 days. We will probably play a game to break the ice such as the engagement ring necklace game and will pass out organza wrapped candy as favors. The main thing is getting together, not how fancy your party is. Most of the people invited will be real close family and friends anyway so they are not going to care. Save that time, energy and creativity for the wedding. Congratulations to all of you. :-)

Hi everyone. I see everyone is getting ready for their engagement parties. I am going to get engaged in the next few months. The ideas of faux rose petals and faux engagement rings is something different and unique. I will most likely use it in my engagement party. the rose petals are located on 2 sites (www.wedthings.com and www.weddingfavorites.com)and vary in color and quanity BUT the engagement rings can not be found there. I did several different searches on the web but i didn't find anything cheap. Does anyone know of the faux engagement ring site? Also what i am going to do along with those ideas (when i locate the rings) is have a center piece with various flowers. Not too expensive you don't want to go overboard just something simple to accomodate your decorations. I was also thinking of adding to the tables candles depending how big our hall will be and how many people will be seated at each table (that has not been finalized cause he has not popped the question yet lol ) Then we can determine if we are going to have a big engagement or not. Either way, we BOTH have BIG families lol. Then you have the problem who to invite or not jezzz lol So the candles i want them to be unique as well. Instead of regular figurines i was thinking of a romantic paper luminaries with heart and dove cut-outs with tealite candles inside for that special touch. Those who are looking for some ideas, themes etc here are a few websites that might help you: www.simplyweddingstuff.com www.wedding-needs.com www.allaboutshowers.com www.imagebydesign.com I hope these sites are helpful, they where too me. Good Luck everyone I am sure everything will work out great! :)

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Hi,

You guys have some great ideas, though I think Amalia's idea that $15-20 gifts for an engagement party is CHEAP is soooooo tacky...If you follow etiquette, you shouldn't even expect gifts at your engagement party! You should be gracious to ALL your guests, whether they bring gifts or not! To keep this on topic, one game people sometimes play which is fun is the Chair-sit Icebreaker game. The idea is to seat your guests in chairs in a circle. The guider reads out directions like 'Everyone wearing glasses,move three seats to your left' or 'Everyone with two or more sisters, move one chair right' etc. It's quite funny because you can end up sitting in someone's lap if they don't have to move. Sometimes, you have five or more people sitting in the same chair and it's a cool way to get to know somebody! :D The object of the game is to get back into your original seat. Hope you all have fun at your engagement parties and that they all go off well!

Hi,

You guys have some great ideas, though I think Amalia's idea that $15-20 gifts for an engagement party is CHEAP is soooooo tacky...If you follow etiquette, you shouldn't even expect gifts at your engagement party! You should be gracious to ALL your guests, whether they bring gifts or not! To keep this on topic, one game people sometimes play which is fun is the Chair-sit Icebreaker game. The idea is to seat your guests in chairs in a circle. The guider reads out directions like 'Everyone wearing glasses,move three seats to your left' or 'Everyone with two or more sisters, move one chair right' etc. It's quite funny because you can end up sitting in someone's lap if they don't have to move. Sometimes, you have five or more people sitting in the same chair and it's a cool way to get to know somebody! :D The object of the game is to get back into your original seat. Hope you all have fun at your engagement parties and that they all go off well!

HELP! i need ideas to introduce everyone! My parents are having the engagement party for us at their house, with 60+ people. I want everyone to know the bridal party and meet his parents and my parents? any suggestions? we met at the beach and he proposed at the Philadelphia Zoo... that might help you creative people out there. the party is in 4 weeks.

Im looking for ideas to write on the engagement invitations... i want a nice poem that emphasizes in a nice way that i dont want presents, but money or gift vouchers would be good? Any ides??

HELP....while touring wedding reception venues i saw a brides wedding favors were m&ms with their names on one color and date on the other color....does anyone know where I can find and order these???

This is how my fiance and I announced our wedding party. We did it in two ways...

1st We purchased small photo albums for each our our attendants, users, flower girl, ring bearer, & personal attendants. We then filled the albums with pictures of that person with my fiance and/or I. We wrote a personal message on the inside cover about why that person is important to us. In the last photo slot in the album we created a card that said, "We would be honored if you would be a "bridesmaid" in our upcoming wedding". We wrapped them up and handed them out at the party to the wedding party.

2nd - I created a video photo montage that we presented after the distribution of the albums. The video consisted of and introduction of the engaged couple with picutres, pictures of the church, reception hall, limo and other wedding planning things. Then we had a section about each attendant and finished up with group pictures.

well im going to this engagement party but im not sure what kind of gift is appropriate since the couple has been living together for some time now please help what should i buy that they dont already have and what seems appropriate for the occasion.

I wanted to comment to Candi. I think it is terrible that people registered for lots of gifts over the $100 mark! I could barely bring myself to register for anything over $50 for my shower, and we did no registering of any kind for our engagement party. I never heard of such a thing, and considering your friends' wedding will have about 400 people in attendance, they should just be grateful that "most" people would just like to give them cash instead of huge price-ticket items like lawnmowers! They could have been a little less tacky by just registering for gift certificates at a place like Home Depot or Lowe's if they are trying to improve their home. EEK. I can just see the gift table now: picture frames, a wedding clock, and ... a John Deere. Good luck anyway, it should prove to be interesting!

ATTENTION BRIDES! Wow. I am absolutely floored by most of you. An engagement party is not about getting gifts or giving out cute trinkets that introduce your wedding "theme." I am surprised that so many of you are treating the engagement party as a marketing opportunity, as if you were launching your wedding like some sort of theatrical production. Please, get hold of yourselves! An engagement party is not a wedding event at all. It is simply an occasion to bring two sets of families and friends together so they can get to know one another and form alliances prior to the stultifyingly boring showers and wedding events. (I know all of you brides think your wedding events will be a thrill for all involved. You will be wrong, but that's okay.) Here's the thing about an engagement party: any way a family chooses to do this is fine. A potluck picnic in the backyard is just as nice as an elegant cocktail or dinner party. There are only three rules you need to follow: 1) You cannot under any circumstances ask guests to pay cash for ANYTHING at an engagement party. You can ask guests to bring an item of food or beverage to contribute to the party, but you CANNOT ask for cash reimbursement for the party's expenses. 2) You should not ask guests to play silly games that put the focus on you. Don't you think you'll get more than enough attention once the actual wedding events begin? Let your engagement party be about your families and friends getting to know one another. Your job is to make introductions and point out possible common interests, just as you would at any party you host in your married life to come. 3) Gifts are NOT expected at an engagement party. If someone is so kind as to bring you a token, you should thank them profusely and declare that you certainly never expected such a surprise and you are overwhelmed by their generosity. It is your job to tell them they "shouldn't have" and mean it.

Other than that, relax and have a good time with your friends & families. TALK about your engagement story, TELL people about your wedding plans. Don't send them home with silly souveniers they don't want or need. One of the most important things you need to know as you plan your wedding is that your friends and relatives are not going to cherish your big day the way you think you will. (You won't. You will spend thousands of dollars on it, and yet in ten years those wedding photos will go un-looked at by anyone. Including you. That's a simple fact of life- ask anybody who's been married five years or more.)

Good luck and make it be FUN!

I agree with the lady that said to lay off the "gay" comments, not all of us are bitter or have a miserable life. Chill out!

Everyone else, thanks for the great ideas!

Congratulations!

I agree with the lady that said to lay off the "gay" comments, not all of us are bitter or have a miserable life. Chill out!

Everyone else, thanks for the great ideas!

Congratulations!

I am having a BBQ theme engagement party and I have a few ideas for you guys. Well, my party is not until August 15th but I already started planning. First I thought, WHAT IS THE FOCUS OF THIS EVENT? Ask yourselves that! My answer was bringing two families together. I decided to have it in a place that would not pin people down like a hall. TO me a park gives people an option to fly a frisbee, play football, eat burgers and of course TALK! My theme is all sunshine and daisies. My centerpieces are blocks of grass with daisies popping out with yellow ribbons at the sides. The food is ALL ABOUT PRESENTATION: I went to my local discount place and bought $4 wicker baskets. In one I will put dinner rolls, in the other the plastic forks,knives, spoons and in the smallest one the party favor. Although some think it is not necessary , HEY neither is an engagement party. I choose "Lovesavers" wrapped candy. All the napkins and plates are yellow and I even am making a watermelon basket, JUST MAKE EVERYTHING YOUR OWN, MAKE IT FUN!! We are going to make a poster board with our dating pictures and another one for people to give us their advise. Remember,dont take too much advise from people, everyone has there own opinion on what a wedding should be, what a bridal shower should be ect, THIS IS YOUR PARTY, you'll only have 1 engagement party, cherish it and remember to give your hubby to be lots of love-- the #1 reason you're even there!!!

HAPPY PLANNING marialys143@hotmail.com

I forgot to mention, ALOT OF PEOPLE are talking about how "rude" it is to register!! I wasnt BUT the minute my family and friends go my HOMEMADE INVITATIONS they immediately asked where I was registered!!! I was either going to register or get things although we appreciate, we really wont use. So we registered at BED BATH AND BEYOND and my items are flying from the list. Although throwing an engagement party is NOT a reason to get gifts, you will,,,, might as well get something you want

Iam trying to figure out what is the best way to ask the people to be in my wedding. Iam having the Engagement party next weekend and iam in desprate need of help , Can someone please help me before i start to pull my hair Thanks A Mill

Joe

As long as I can remember, and according to etiquette experts(such as Miss Manners)..an engagement part was to announce and/ or celebrate an engagement...no party favors or games...and most definately no gifts...greedy greedy brides....

Etiquette dictates that gifts should not be expected at engagement parties. This rule may vary, however, depending on your regional culture. You may want to explicitly state “best wishes only” in your invitations, or by word of mouth, if you do not expect gifts. Some guests will want to bring a gift even if they are not expected to. In these instances, you may want to wait until after the party to open them so as to not make your other guests feel guilty. You will also want to send a thank-you note to those guests who do give you a gift.

look up any wedding etiquette source online..they all say NO gifts...here is an excerpt of one I found

The bride's parents often host this party (surprise of not) and gifts are NOT given at an engagement party. This doesn't mean gifts aren't given - they just aren't given at the party; here's why - tradition has it that engagement gifts usually go to the bride only and are usually only given by family members and very, very close personal friends - these gifts are often mailed to the house or brought along on a personal one-on-one visit. With this gift-giving protocol in mind, if the very, very close friends and family came to an engagement party with gifts in hand it could or would make the other guests uneasy - ergo - NO GIFTS at an engagement party. Do YOU give a gift - figure that even a number of probable bridesmaids wouldn't be expected to give a gift - then - your relationship with the bride-to-be really needs to be very personal and very intimate - otherwise - forget it. So I am all for simple...especially if there will be a bridal shower..I am going to an engagement party and it will be outside in Brides parents backyard..chicken, pasta, salad...etc...the idea isint to outdo a wedding..its for a chance to the families to get together..as for bridal regisrty..I usually ask when there is a shower..but if it is mentioned in any invitation..I give cash..tacky to include that information...

announce the bridal party at your engagement party. and then... you can line all of them up, give each of them ring pops, and then have them sworn into the bridal party: like... with this ring, I (state your name) promise to stand by (name of bride and groom) through nervous breakdowns, bitchy-ness, wild bachelor/bachlorette parties, and everything not stated above in the wedding planning process... or something... Just something cute.

A friend of mine is planning her engagement party. She and her partner have already decided to have a wishing well at the wedding, instead of gifts, but don't know what to do about engagement presents. They have been living together for six years so have nothing they really want. Any ideas

Forgot to mention, if you do have any ideas e-mail is kristylharris@hotmail.com

Is it proper for a father to host an engagement party? The maid of honor has not offered and the brides mother is in another state.

Im getting engaged in a few months time. Its only for 20 people which is my direct family and his direct family. How can we be different and make it special.?? Please help.I want it to be memorable.

My family is having an engagement Luau at my parent's lake cottage for my sister and her fiance. It'll be "lei'd back" as we'll be listening to Jimmy Buffet at the "Tiki Bar" serving tropical refreshments and singing karaoke in the evening... no hula contests and we debated on getting a pig but decided chicken would be better. It'll be a day for enjoying sand/sun. They'll be going to Hawaii for their honeymoon, got engaged in Florida and met/grew up on the beach and they are having a beach ceremony for their wedding next summer. I did get personalized confetti (www.confoti.com) which I added their wedding date to along with photos (email me for 5% off code) to combine a save the date and decorative accent on the tables.

brittbowe@hotmail.com

My engagement party is this coming weekend. My sister and mom are hositng it. It will be a casual bbq dinner at my sisters pool side cabana. They will have the buffet table simply decorated with white linen with scattered rose red petals and red tea light candles. There will be a white flower wreath, that my sister made, on the door. The food will be bbq ribs, chicken and salads and side dishes broght by family members. For desert we will have a strawberry cake with whip cream frosting and chocolate dipped strawberries. We put pictures of both families in silver frames along with photos of my fiance and I as children and us together now. Those will be placed near the cake table and throughout the cabana We will just be playing music in the background and we can mingle outside by the pool as well as inside. I don't want to play any games as the purpose of the party it to introduce the families to each other. I will however, have a scrapbook passed around for the guests to offer "words of wisdom".

Our wedding is in September 2005 in Maui although to many the location will be a surprise, so we made little gift boxes filled with chocolates shaped like sea shells and wrapped the boxed with red raffia with a seashell glued to the middle of the bow. There is a tag with a mini photo of us attached to the raffia that says "Our Maui wedding will soon arrive, please mark your calendar for September 2005". This will announce the location and date of our weddig to the gueste and they can take these home on thier way out.

Oh, we'll also have children at the party so we'll be having sand buckets filled with coloring books, crayons and toys to keep them occupied while the adults mingle.

I'm not expecting gifts nor have I registered at this point. I think that will be saved for the wedding since it's over a year away anayway.

Hope these ideas help. Congrats to the engaged couples! Any comments or questions please e-mail me at lulusantil@yahoo.com.

I want to give my son and wonderful fiance an engagement party. Problem is, I live in a tiny apartment and have a very small budget. I was thinking about giving it in a restaurant. Questions: (1) is it appropriate for the mother of the groom to give the party? (2) Is it appropriate to ask the guests to pay for their own dinners?

Thanks so much. Sheila

Some wedding books that I have read actually indicates that it is the Groom's parents responsibility to throw the enegagement party. So i think you can give the party as the mother of the groom. I think it would be awkward to ask the guests to pay for their own dinners. You should shop around for prices and find the best deal. If you don't feel uncomfortable about asking the guests to pay, you may try it and see how they respond.

A friend of mine is getting married in November. I'm putting together an Engagement party for October. Has anyone ever heard of an engagement/bridal shower? Has it ever been done?

my engagement party is next saturday...we just called everyone to let them know, but a similar thing happened in terms of everyone calling back to find out where we were registered -- i was certainly surprised and am now wondering, what the heck would 2 people register anyways? my fiance and i don't live together, so i can't imagine why it would be appropriate to register appliances or bedding..and if not that, what?

i am planning an engagement party for the end of the year. It will probably be at my place with 50 or so close friends and family. Since my parents are hosting the party, would it be appropriate to ask the grooms parents to pay for the alcohol or cake etc.? my parents will have enough expenses. 50/50 seems a good precedent to set for the wedding as well. Opinions please?

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Sarah, I don't think it would be inappropriate for the groom's parents to OFFER to put in half for the engagment party but to ASK them to put in might make them feel bad for not having offered already. I suppose it depends on how close you are with them, how your fiance feels about approaching them and how involved you have let them be with the arrangements. I think if you have swapped ideas about the wedding/engagement party with your in-laws-to-be and have involved them to some extent, that would be ok. They might offer at the last minute but I wouldn't plan on that. Enjoy all your planning!

Hey Sarah, this is for your engagrment/bridal shower question. Ya know... I had a really good friend do the same thing. They didn't have a "bridal shower" instead they just had an engagement party but we all new they were hoping it get some gifts (not in a rude way at all in case the gift police are reading) and we all played those silly birdal shower games which turned out to be a lot more fun with the guys around. Have fun and good luck!

Can you tell me who is supposed to pay for the engagement party?? Bride or groom parents?

Thanks

I am helping throw an engagement party this weekend. A great cake idea: Get a photo of the couple and take it to Vons grocery store. The bakery department will copy it onto sugar paper for $6. You can put it on your own cake. It makes a great converastion piece!

Sorry girls, but I think engagment parties are selfish and just another way to grab all you can get. You're asking a lot of people. Time and money!! Engagement party, bachlorette party, shower, wedding...give it a rest. Trust me, after your married YOU won't want to attend any of these functions for your friends. You won't have enough money or time. Ridiculous.

One more comment on that - 52% of marriages end in divorce. So you ask all your friends and relatives to spend their money on you and then more than half of you divorce. Get over it. Just get married quietly, don't spend a lot of money and end up in debt when your first married. Just love each other.

a friend of mine is TRYING to plan her engagement party and as she is only 18 she has no idea and i'm her head bridesmaid and i have no idea either so i was just wondering if anyone could give us some tips

Jean: What is your problem!?! If these men and women want to have engagement parties, bridal showers, etc....don't condemn them for it. If these people have the means to do it...don't be jealous...let them spend their money. What is it your problem. If you don't have money to attend any of these functions, your real friends would understand..and they would want you to come without a gift.

Hi,This site has been very helpful.I just got engaged over the weekend and my parents have already started to formulate a list of guests for the engagement party. They have been waiting for this moment for quite sometime. We have decided to have something casual at my parents house (which I still reside in) end of September.We have decided to invite close friends and immediate family (1st cousin generations). We're hoping that the backyard, family room, living room and dining room will be enough room to host this event. Our only concern is that it might get a little cold and people may migrate inside. We live in Ontario Canada and weather here is pretty unpredictable. I'm looking for fun ideas. I don't want anything too formal and we'd like to make it casual. I just really want everyone to be there and enjoy the moment, meet and celebrate. So far, looks like this guest list is hovering around 60 people and that's including children. I would also like a couple of fun games to play to get everyone involved and mingling. This is also a gathering of three different cultures, italian, scottish and west indian and this will also be the first time that our parents have met our extended familay (aunts, uncles, cousins). If possible, I would like to have a fun theme. There are things that we love. Like Cuba and wine tasting are a few. However, some members may find it boring. Also, we would like to give little parting gifts to our guests. Any ideas? We would also like to stick to a budget so the sky is not the limit on this one as well! Thank you in advance for all your help. If you do have ideas, please feel free to e-mail me at lisa_c_henry@hotmail.com

Jean...it is not proper etiquette for anyone other than immediate family to give engagement gifts (refer Emily Post). So, if this concerns you, write "No gifts please" on the invitations if you want to discourage these acts of kindness or obligatory giving. Or, ask your guests to donate a few dollars to a local charity instead of buying gifts..be creative. Life is too short and lacking in kindness to degrade any bride or groom, rich or poor the opportunity to have a party with the people she/he loves....what are you doing looking at this website if you are against these types of celebrations anyway? Get that chip off your shoulder girl!

I think it doesnt matter either way- if you want to have a party, do it. If you dont- dont. if you want gifts, dont say anything, if you dont, tell them personally.

there is no right way to do anything, all of these questions about who should pay and who should host- there is no one answer!!

i am from australia and down here we dont give a s**t either way, we just enjoy ourselves. in case you forgot- that is why you are having a party!

our party is on this sat and everyone (both families) contributed their help.i think you are just scared that someone is going to have been to a "better" party than yours!!

I just want to say CONGRATULATIONS to all the brides to be! My parents are throwing me and my fiance an engagement party in September and I am very nervous/excited! I hope it will turn out good, and i hope everyond has a good time. I like the confetti idea...it's unique and seems like a lot of fun. I also like the idea of the picture cake! Thanks for all the great ideas...this web site is very helpful! HAVE FUN! =)

I need ideas on an indian theme engagement party which is going to be held at home.

I just found this website and have read many posts. Everyone has such good ideas! I am doing a scrapbook/journal for my brother and his fiancee. I am trying to come up with things for them to record so that they can always remember their courtship, the proposal itself and the planning of the wedding. If anyone has any ideas of things to record before the actual wedding day please let me know.

ie: First date How and where did he propose How you felt etc.

Thanks in advance for your help.

We got a copy of this great book called "100+ Wedding Games" which describes a bunch of games appropriate for the bachelorette party, shower, and reception. Check it out for games that can be used for the engagement party too!

Hey Ladies...My fiance and I are having an engagement party on October 9, 2004. His family is really large and so inviting only the closest people still leaves us with about 100 people. We're still waiting on the RSVPs to get an exact head count.

With 100+ people of our closest family we couldn't host it at our home or a restaurant so by default, we had to have it in a banquet hall which costs about $30/head. This does not include any decorations, etc.

While the parents have decided to gift us this party by paying per head for their respective sides, I think its only fair that the guests bring a gift for the couple. While it may sound rude, I believe in this case, it's almost expected because in return, they will receive this fabulous lunch in a hall which unlike boston market, costs us $120 for a family of four. I would think that after seeing the location its held or the customized invitations, they would realize that there needs to be some reciprocity, whether its cash, a physical gift or some kind of service, ie. help with decorations the day of.

Both of us are Indian, except I'm a Hindu and he's a Muslim. We had out traditional engagement which was a nice mix of both and I'm sure that the party itself in October will go just as smoothly. To save some $$$, one of our friends will be the DJ. Since we will be playing games to break the ice, we'll probably just use the set up for that and maybe soe light jazz during lunch. We will be playing the ring game..where for the first 2 hours whoever says "engagement" gets their ring taken. Whoever has collected the most by the end of the day will win a prize.

Another game..while they are handed their ring necklaces, each family will also receive a card with a word on it. Another family from the other side will receive a corresponding word. For example, peanut butter and jelly, or salt and pepper, etc. It will be the responsibility of each family to find their match and introduce eachother when the match words are called aloud.

Yet another game which may get nixed is 20 questions. We will ask questions concerning my fiance and I and whoever can answer the most questions will win a prize. The only problem with this one is that my now fiance was and still is my best friend and we never had any real first dates, or things like "our song." So, i'm not too sure what kind of questions to develop.

Well, I would love to hear your thoughts and I will post a follow-up once its all said and done. Congratulations to you all.

I forgot to add that my mother-in-law to be bought me this beautiful dress of burgundy ivory and gold for the engagement. Thus, our theme colors were born. I was able to get great deals off of e-bay.

I bought balloons in bulk and so we will have a balloon archway and table centerpieces made from burgundy and ivory balloons. Even the necklaces we will be handing out for games are made from burgundy and ivory thread...the kind i used to make friendship bracelets with as a kid.

There will also be a small favor for each individual. From the local craft store (Michael's)I purchased 100 burgundy tulle 9" circle for

This thing keep cutting me off. I purchased them for < $10. I also bought several bags of melting white chocolate so that I could make white hearts from molds. From the clearance bin, I got several spools of ivory ribbon with gold trim for $1/each. So for less than $20, I can make about 100 favors.

Another great idea...leaving a $1 scratch off instant lotto ticket at each place setting. If anyone should win big at your event..I am sure it will be a memorable occaision for everyone.

Ami, how long were you engaged? I am engaged 6 months and I was wondering when to have my engagement party? Is it too late?

Well we knew we were getting engaged so the planning began way before the actualy engagement which took placy on 8/21...the party is on 10/9. hope that helps.

Most people have an engagment party to announce it to relatives who otherwise would be clueless and to have the two families meet before the wedding. IMO, if over the course of 6 months, you've already informed most family memebers, or most have already met eachother, it defeats the purpose of the party.

hi anne, well....generally the rules are you should have the engagement party no more than 3 months after the engagement date. after that, it just seems old and stale news because everyone at that point pretty much knows. HOWEVER, you can have like a dinner party and invite both sides of the family so they can all meet before the wedding. also, when are you getting married? my cousin had his engagement party a few months before he got married. i found it a little inappropriate as everyone already knew they were getting married as the wedding invitations had already been sent out. but i think if you have a party or just have everyone over for wine or something, and don't list it as an "engagement party" and just as a way to introduce both families, that should be fine and not tacky.

unfortunatly, b/c of events being held almost every weekend for the next 2 mons, we have had to push back our engagement party to november 6th. but its good 'cause it gives us more time to work on planning it, and choosing our bridal party which is becoming stressful. any ideas how to include people in your bridal party without them being bridesmaids? they are all b/w the ages of 18 - 27.i am trying to keep it to 5 MAX on ech side. but it seems as though it might have to be 6. the other problem is there are close friends who won't be included b/c there are other ppl who need to be included. like my sister and his two sisters. also, we run into problems that my fiance doesn't know enough close males to include on his side. what do we do? any advice would be greatly appreciated. Lisa

Hi- My parents are giving us an engagment party later this month. My mom asked me if their should be a champagne toast and if so, who gives the toast? Does anyone know? Also, I am having a hard time finding centerpieces for both the engagment party and the reception. Does anyone have any fun ideas. Thank you.

Our engagement party was going to be held outside, however the weather is not playing fair and while it has been nice for the past 6 weeks here i am 2 days before the party and its forecast for rain. Luckily we have a double garage off of the kitchen and quite a large open plan house so most people will fit, the only problem we have is that we dont have enough seats (unless i can encourage the smokers to stay in the garage)

Our favours are small cellophane bags, a small piece of thin silver card placed inside and then hearts from around the world in them. I managed to get some small rose quartz hearts for under a dollar a piece and tied a ribbone to each, kisses from the USA, red foil hearts from the UK and a huge bag of large 'lovehearts' with cute wedding type sayings. Altogether the cost for 50 favour bags was under $80. The labels we printed ourselves and personalised with a short thank you message. We did not include the wedding date though as it will be a more family based event and most from the party will not be invited to the ceremony only the celebration afterwards.

With regard to gifts, because we already live together we have everything we need for the house and so encouraged people to not bring gifts. We were going to suggest a donation which would be used towards a larger purchase but couldnt find the right words and so omitted it completely.

I forgot .... instead of the platter plate foe everyone to sign one of my close friends who can not attend sent me a 'signature bear' and wrote her congratulations message on it. We have decided to leave the bear out during the engagement party for all our guests to sign.

One quick question: Who, exactly, should be invited to an engagement party? Also, do the guests have to also be attending the wedding, later on? Or can you invite some people exclusively to the engagement party, just to announce your engagement to them? Any advice on a guest list is appreciated, you can post it here or e-mail me here: slr2466@louisiana.edu

Stephanie, Close family and friends should be invited, its only right for them to be invited to your wedding hope this helps.

well, i am planning to have a sikh tradition wedding, could you please suggest me some songs indian or american music, on which the bride and the bridegroom could dance

I am throwing an engagement party for a very dear friend, but I do not know the grooms family that well. I want to surprise the bride and groom, so I figured I would just invite a few close friends and later their families will do something for them. Please advise.

Hi Meek, That's fine. I don't see why you can't throw and engagement party with just close friends of the bride and groom. as a soon-to-be-bride, i would LOVE for one of my friends to throw me one and am even thinking about throwing one myself for JUST my friends. just to celebrate really. and i think the way we celebrate with our friends is different from how we would celebrate with our family. but go right ahead. my mum and i are looking for a way to word our engagement invitations. any ideas? or any idea where we can get some ideas? we have a long time to plan for this but would like to get started soon. close friends and family will both be attending. any fun ice breaker games? thanks!

Hi Meek, That's fine. I don't see why you can't throw and engagement party with just close friends of the bride and groom. as a soon-to-be-bride, i would LOVE for one of my friends to throw me one and am even thinking about throwing one myself for JUST my friends. just to celebrate really. and i think the way we celebrate with our friends is different from how we would celebrate with our family. but go right ahead. my mum and i are looking for a way to word our engagement invitations. any ideas? or any idea where we can get some ideas? we have a long time to plan for this but would like to get started soon. close friends and family will both be attending. any fun ice breaker games? thanks!

Hi, My engagement party is coming up in two weeks. I wanted to keep it small. Instead of having a cake we are asking everyone to make their favorite pies and we also decided to use "ring pops" as the favors. We opened each one and put the rings in a small clear plastic bag and tied it with a fall color ribbon. Then my dad printed out our expected wedding date on strips of paper and we tied it w/ the ribbon. Just wanted to give a couple of ideas. Good Luck everyone!!

Lisa, My parents and I made the engagement invitations and it only cost $20.00. We used the pic of my ring from our engagement day and made it black and white, using our home printer. Then we bought velum and printed out what we wanted to say, and then held it together over the pic with silver ribbon at the very top of the invite. That way all of our guests would always have a pic of my ring. We also put RSVP cards in the env. too. As for a game... When the guest arrive they will write on a piece of paper when they think our wedding date will be, and when its time to tell everyone we will first read all the answers and who ever comes close will get a "door prize". I am also at a loss for any "ice breaker" games though.

I have really enjoyed this site. I am the Mother of the Groom and am co-hosting the engagement party along with the Mother of the Bride, in Oct. We are throwing a Starbucks coffee themed party, using candle votive globes filled with coffee beans and small candles.We'll have a coffee bar and casual food. My Son and his fiance have had many dates at Starbucks and She chose her bridesmaid dresses with the color of Latte so it just flowed from there. For other decorations I want to hang cute pics of coffee mugs with a special named coffee drink combining both of their names on it. Wish us luck!!

Hello ladies: The party was a smash hit!!! Everyone loved it, they're still talking about it after the fact. The food was excellent. We picked the place knowing the food would be everyone's focus. The door prizes were great. You could hear a pin drop while we were calling aloud the raffle numbers. The ring game I had mentioned earlier got rave reviews. It forced people to chat with one another in order to claim the grand prize. I couldn't have wished for a better party and it will be difficult to top this for the wedding!

Hello ladies! I absolutely love the ideas I am seeing, so creative! Soon after becoming engaged, (about 3 weeks ago!) my sister suggested throwing an engagement party for us. Seeing as how right now it is October and it will take some time to plan this out, we are looking at a winter party. I haven't yet seen any ideas for a winter theme, I'd rather not to a Christmas theme, as my fiance's family are devout Christians who do not celebrate Christmas, so a winter theme may be more suitable. Any ideas? My E-Mail is KellyMRago@yahoo.com or I will be checking the site as well. Thank you!

Hey girls, Only 4 more days until our engagement party!! We r so excited. Kelly: I got Martha stewarts holiday mag. and they had sections for each holiday and for winter she showed a couple that had the favor as all different kinds of white candy. She got different sizes of clear vases, jars,etc. and each container held a different white candy. They put a white scoop in each and a bag for the guests to fill before they left. it looks really nice. The color they used w/ the white was blue. for the center pieces they had small and large tin buckets filled with this white tinsel. and lots of candles. You could also do something fun like have an all white dress code. you should get martha stewarts mag and others, they r full of fun ideas. Good luck!

Our party was a week ago and everyone had so much fun!! we invited 77 people and all but 2 showed up. people came from all over. It was great to see our families getting along with eachother. The ring pops as favors were a hit. Everyone stayed late into the night. Can't wait to get together with everyone soon! good luck everyone.

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Hi, I'm the maid of honor on my friends up-coming wedding. I live in boston and she lives in Florida so planning is a bit tough for me. A co-worker is throwing her an engagement party in a couple weeks at my friends home and I will be flying down to attend for the weekend. Do I buy a big gift or something little? Do I bring decorations?Should I be incorporating some of the party ideas such as games,favors, etc...? This is all a weird situation and I don't even know the girl who is throwing my friend the party. Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!!!

Hi, my engagement party is December 4th. Any ideas on fun games? And Favors?

Tricia: Congratulations! Dec. is a fun month to do stuff. First you should pick a theme or color because that will help u with the rest. Say u wanted a victorian winter theme. You could make everything old fashioned and to get guests involved u could write in the invite that there is an all white dress code or whatever color u want. (I saw someone do that it was fun)! Say u want an all white theme w/ red accents around. For favors you could make ornaments with your engagement pics on them and give them to people as they leave. Or you could write in the invite that you would like each guest to bring 1 ornament to the party. When they get there have a fake or real tree waiting w/ lights on it. When each guest arrives have them place it on the tree. Let them know that they are giving you your first set of christmas or chanukka decorations. guest love to get involved. After you pick a theme, think about you budget and then where to have it. Think about how many people. Do u want just your wedding party and close friends and fam. there or is it a larger party? Think about the menu. keep the theme going w/ the food as well. Or u don't even need a theme, you could just have it at home with a potluck dinner or lunch. read mag. and search the web. get inspired by the season. Have fun w/ it but remember that it is really about the two of u, do what is best for u. Good Luck!!!

Amanda: Thanks so much for all the great ideas. We've decided to have a cocktail party. Our colors are going to be teal and silver. I know it's not really christmas colors but it looks really pretty together. Any ideas on games?? That everybody would enjoy. Thanks again.

Tricia: We played one game at our party. My sisters and I wrote 20 questions about my man and me. Some of the questions we knew some guests wouldn't know and some would. We told them that they can't ask me or him any of the questions but they could ask anyone else. We wanted them to have to get to know the other side of the family. It worked and everyone loved it. The last question we asked was what they thought our expected wedding date would be, we had kept it a secret. That's how we announced the date to everyone. I think a cocktail party is great! You could put a marking on one of the glasses and that person would get a gift. You could put stuff in jars and have people guess how much is in it. You could put fake wedding rings or candy in it. I don't really know though. We had a hard time with this too. I went to a cocktail party once and they had wine glasses made up with their names written on it. It was a nice favor to take home. Are you going to have a special drink?

Amanda: What are some questions you guys used? Were running out of ideas. Were going to have some imported and domestic beers,wine,champagne & the basic liquor's. My friends have 12 questions. I wanted 20. So, we have to think of some more & we were trying to think of stuff that if funny and people would have a good time. Any suggestions???

Tricia: here are some of our questions; 1: How long have the bride and groom been together? 2: Where did the groom propose? 3: How did he propose? 4: Where did they meet? 5: what is the couples favorite movie? 6: What was the groom told to do, by the brides father, before he could propose? ~ CLEAN THE GARAGE (EVERYONE LOVED THIS ONE). 7: How much (in karats) does the bride's engagement ring weigh? 8: How do you spell the grooms first name? (Everyone in my family has a hard time with his name 'cause its not a normal guys name, its Kalle). 9: what is the bride and grooms song? 10: Why is that their song? 11: What exact date do you think the couple will wed? Hint:it is in the end of spring and beginning of summer. 12: Where do the bride and groom hope to honeymoon? Everyone had a ball w/ this and it took the whole party for people to walk around and ask other guests for the answers. You could make it personal and say, "what is the brides pet peeve about the groom"? or "where did they have their first kiss"? lol I don't know though, u can use all of mine if you want. I can't think of the others though I don't have the sheet w/ the questions on it. Hope I could help. Hey I just found out that the web site "The Knot" lets you make your own bridal web page for free. just go to the web site. its awesome! I made my own, and all of your guest can go on it to see your story and where you are registerd, they also send you e-mails of bridal shows and trunk shows. its kool. good luck!

My mom wants to host an engagement party for me and my fiancee, however, we wont be getting married until October of 2009 (Thats right 2009) because I promised my dad I would finish college before I got married. When would the right time be to have the engagement party?

I was recently engaged (last wednesday) to my boyfriend of almost 1 1/2 yrs. The day was of course the happipest day of my life. I was wondering if it would be a common thing to do for me to give him a gift. As a thank you for the ring and the wonderful day? and if so...can you give me some ideas? Please email with advice...it will be greatly appreciated martha923@nycmail.com Thanks!

Lisa: I was told that you should have your engagement party 6 months to a year before your wedding. But I didn't do that, I had mine this past october and we are getting married next May. If you want to wait you could just send out announcements to out of town guests or everyone. you could put an ad in the paper of your engagement. Mostly the engagement party is to announce your wedding date and the wedding party.

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I am a brides maid in my friends wedding and she is having her engagement party in January. I have never been to an engagement party before and have no idea what to get as a gift. any ideas?

Just a fast question When do you think it is appropiate to through a engagment party for a newly engaged couple???

Thanks

Nikki-The only engagement party I went to we got the bride and groom stuff to help them plan a wedding, and stuff to help them relax. In fact, I got them a DVD player with dvd's like The Wedding Planner, etc...

Tonya- I got engaged about 2 weeks ago, we are having ours in March, so we have time to plan it, and we are getting married in Sept. 05. Hope this helps!

Try a personalized "engagement party photo poster" announcing the happy couple. Available at www.bannergrams.com in the "wedding section".

Hi,

I really like the different ideas that are on here.

I have only been engaged for 2 days (after dating with my now fiance for 3 weeks), but would like to start planning my engagement party as it is going to be at the end of Feb/beginning of March 05. We are not planning to get married for at least another year after the engagement party, but I would like the engagement party to be a little different.

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.

Also how do you decide who to chose as bridesmaids, especially if there are a few people that you would like to ask??

Hi,

I really like the different ideas that are on here.

I have only been engaged for 2 days (after dating with my now fiance for 3 weeks), but would like to start planning my engagement party as it is going to be at the end of Feb/beginning of March 05. We are not planning to get married for at least another year after the engagement party, but I would like the engagement party to be a little different.

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.

Also how do you decide who to chose as bridesmaids, especially if there are a few people that you would like to ask??

Hi,

I really like the different ideas that are on here.

I have only been engaged for 2 days (after dating with my now fiance for 3 weeks), but would like to start planning my engagement party as it is going to be at the end of Feb/beginning of March 05. We are not planning to get married for at least another year after the engagement party, but I would like the engagement party to be a little different.

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.

Also how do you decide who to chose as bridesmaids, especially if there are a few people that you would like to ask??

Hi Amanda, I had a really hard time picking who would be in my bridal party. So I asked everyone of my closest friends, and my two sisters. All-in-all, I have 7 bridesmaids and my fiance' has 8. If you have more then that to choose from, or u just want to keep it small, I'm sure your friends would understand. There are plenty of other things that they can help out with. you can have a couple of them host the wedding, meaning to make sure the guests are happy and going to the right places. This is a new trend now I guess. The guys that you don't ask to be in the bridal party, could usher the guests to their seats if the groomsmen are busy. Some friends could be asked to make the cake or help make the favors. this way everyone feels like they have a party in their friends big day. Hope this helps! Congrates!!

I meant to say "part in their friends big day">

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I am having an engagement party for my brother and his fiance, who was my maid of honor a few months ago. I would like someone to give me some ideas. I already know where I am having it. Immediate family and wedding party are invited. I want it to be special and different. I'm just a little stumped.

My niece is having an engagement party. I will not be going because I live too far. If I get an invitation, does that mean I have to send her a gift? Also, my mother has never been to an engagement party so she doesn't know what to get her. Any ideas??? My mom does not have much money.

Fellow Brides to Be, We are having an engagement party in a few weeks & I found some wonderful ideas on here! Thanks! It's important to remember that you are celebrating your love & happiness...so try not to feel obligated to make it a fabulous affair. I know it's hard to control the urge (I reality check myself 5 times per day =)...but don't blow the bank. Save it to buy that designer gown. Also, please IGNORE the outdated etiquette quotes on here. Many things (like engagement gifts) depend on many factors, such as where in the country you live. Hey, it's your party and you can cry (or register) if you want to!

Happy Planning!

Miss Manners always points out that one is never obligated to give a gift. Most people I know give small sentimental gifts that the bride and groom might appreciate - now this can range in expense, of course, from tickets to a play, bottle of wine, etc. From my own experience, cocktails and finger foods are adequate - a limited budget might allow for just wine and cheese - a larger budget might allow for a sit-down dinner. I would never plan an event which required guests to pay for dinner (unless maybe you have a close-knit group of friends who might expect this arrangement). If you can't afford to pay for dinner for everyone, then scale it down. I have to admit that I like parties with themes. You can draw from hobbies and interests of the bride and groom or even interesting events that may be around the date of the party like cinco de mayo, the Oscars, local music festivals, mardi gras, etc. Like some of the earlier posts, I think the favors should be simple and incorporate the date of the wedding somehow. Good Luck and have fun.

Just a couple more ideas o get they party mingling. These are probably not knew as I just adapted them from Teaching activities I have done in the classroom. * Blindfold the bride and groom to be and have them draw a picture of how they imaginge their fiancee will look on their big day. These can then be displayed for the guests to have a giggle at later in the night. * Give each guest a sheet with statements such as someone with there anniversary in June and Sister of someone in the bridal party etc (Limit to about 10 things) then have your guests find someone to sign the appropriate box as true.The winner is the first one to have there sheet all filled up with names. You can only use the same name on your card once. This way your guests have to get chatting and have got something to start off the conversation.

My fianace and I are inviting our family and some close friends to what they think is an engagement party but it is actually our wedding. Does anyone have any ideas on plannig without giving away the surprise.

Oh My God!! I love it. I wanted to do that at mine but I knew my mom would kill me. are you going to tell anyone? bridesmaids, close friends? If a couple people are going to know then they can help you. (You could also higher someone to do it for u). To make it look like its just an engagement party, u could still ask family and friends to help with things. Then they won't think something is up. Give them small tasks to do while you are really doing the bigger things to get ready. When is your wedding? where will it be? congrates!!

As a MOTB (mother-of-the-bride) to be, I am so happy to have found this website! All the brides to be have wonderful ideas for engagement party's that I am in the beginning stages of planning for my beautiful daughter and future son-in-law. My daughter Shanna and her fiance Max, got engaged 1/15/05 and are planning a wedding in 5/06. My family is a very close family and his family is non-committal, so how do I bridge the gap so they would attend the engagement party I am planning for our children?? Any ideas would be greatly appreciated! Thanks and keep the helpful, positive comments flowing. An engagement and wedding are very happy positive events for most families, so let's not ruin it with bad-will for others, as some notes indicate.

Amanda- No one knows anything except my maid of honor and my sister. My fiance's mom is helping with the planning but she thinks it's just an engagement party. It's really hard trying to keep it from everyone especially since there is going to be at least 100 people there(we both have big families). The engagement party/wedding is going to be in May in Virginia at my mother's house.

hosting an engagement party for my niece next month. Sent out invite's I made from photos of the couple with a front page that said " the most precious moment of her life... ken ask kara to be his wife." we are having it in a function hall and providing, dinner, dancing (dj) and drinks for about 100. made hurricane candle with flowered rings center pieces ( to match her colors she wants in her wedding)also rose peddle to sprinkle on the tables. favors will be small white candy bags filled with hersy kisses finished with ribbon that matches and lable that reads keep the date march06 their big day this just a year away. the last thing is to find good " getting to know you games " which I' m sure I'll find on the net. I've spent about 150.00 so far on the invites, center pieces, favors. the hall and food, drinks & dj will be about 25.00 a head. included in with the invites I put direction to hall and also included a information sheet, about gifts and dress. I started by writting " traditionally, engagement party gifts are not expected, For guests that are inclined to bring a gift. a monitary gift would be most appreciated" I also mentioned that informal but yet special night for the couple. I felt it was important to include this. in this area you always bring a gift to an engagement party whether its expected or not, I've seen anything from picture frames and vases to dom pieron and toasting glasses. I rather have guest who are going to give, give wisely. as you all Know by now getting married is expensive before during and after the vows. I used the word informal because I wanted people to dress to their comfort level. We are hoping this will be a fun evening of meetings and greetings one my neice and nephew in-law to be will cherrish. I wish you luck with your plans and congrats to you all.

Ok, I have one (perhaps silly) question. What is the etiquette on engagement parties as far as who throws them? Does the newly engaged couple throw their own, or does someone close to them opt to throw it for them? Does anyone know the right way this should be done? I am the maid of honor for my sister who just got engaged, and we don't know if her and the fiancee should throw it or if I or another friend should. HELP!!

Hi MOTB. I have just had my engagement party and I was in the same predicament as you are. My fiance and his family aren't exactly the most social people in the world and although I invited all of my fiances friends and family, none of his family wanted to come. My family drove for 4 hours to be there along with 70 of my friends, but his entire family who only live five minutes up the road couldn't be bothered to come. I know I did the right thing by inviting them, and I consider it to be their problem that they didn't come. They are a family who don't have any friends and rarely leave their house except to go to work (his dad) and to buy groceries (his mum). As long as you invite them, you know you are doing the right thing, so don't worry. If they don't come, it will be their fault, not yours.

I am the maid of honor in my friends wedding and I want to throw them an engagement/house warming party together. They got engaged in November and are planning on having the wedding at the beach this summer.Since we live in Oklahoma and they are getting married in Florida it is only going to be close friends and family invited to the wedding. Some of the people that I want to invite to the party will not be attending the wedding. They just bought a house and moved in together. Does anybody have ideas for throwing the engagement and housewarming party together? Should they register for gifts? Any ideas will be greatly appreciated.

Leanna- I don't know about registering for gifts for the engagement party. My parents and my fiance's parents threw ours and when I asked if we were supposed to register yet, our mom's almost had a heart attack. They said it is only for the bridal shower and the wedding. I'm sure they could register if they wanted, my parents are jsut very old fashion. if it is a house warming party too, I would guess it would be held at their house so the guests can see it. So that's good, you have a place to have it.

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I would like to encourage all brides-to-be to purchase Emily Post's Etiquette by Peggy Post. It answers a lot of the questions I have been reading on this site, including how to handle difficult situations (estranged families, etc.) If you know a newly engaged couple, this would make a nice engagement party gift (which is not required or expected, per the author) since it covers so many topics. It might be a good idea to jot a little note in the cover that you are not suggesting they need help with their manners, but that you thought it would come in handy with all the upcoming events. Congrats and best wishes to you and your fiances!

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I think it is very very very very tacky for the couple to throw themselves an engagement party That is for the Bride or grooms parents to do that. My niece wanted money to buy something for her fiances truck. I think no gifts should be asked for what so ever. We will get sucked dry with just all the bridal showers and wedding gifts do you all think everyone is made of money?

Why would anyone suggest embarrasing pictures of the bride and groom? (And to be made into poster size yet!) Who would do such a thing to family or special friends?

My best friend just got engaged and I am the maid of honor. I would like to throw her an engagement party (her parents live in Jamaica) I have been reading that traditionally the bride's parents throw the engagement party. Because of her situation, would it be appropriate for me to call her mother and discuss my plans or should I even just ask my friend if she wants a party in the first place? I was thinking an engagement party would be helpful because they have planned a short engagement (date is Aug. 27) and it would be great to give favors w/ "save the dates". I see that this site is about 95% QUESTIONS and hardly any answers but please if you are reading this and have an answer, write me back .Much appreciated!!!

CAROLINE- She is your best friend and It sounds like a great idea to kick off there engagement with giving away save the date cards. Plus, every couple/Bride deserves an egagement party. As for calling her mother go ahead but keep it on the low. Don't let your girlfriend know you called her mom and than have her mom send a special congrats via letter or video. That would be a wonderful treat and a great way to do your part as the maid of honor. Good Luck! Have fun with it.(remember it dosn't have to be a big event either. Keep it simple and stress free for right now!)

CASSIE- Thank you so much for getting back to me so quickly and for the great advice! Have a wonderful weekend!

this is great so many ideas, i am planning an engagement party for my daughter and her iance here is an idea for favors you wrap a small box 3x2 inches tie with curling ribbon you out a small rose on then a tag with this saying This is a very special gift that you can never see the reason its so special is Its just for you from me. If ever your lonely Or even feeling blue

I am giving an engegement party for my daughter and her fiance here is an idea for a favor. You take a small box about 3x2 wrap it in gift paoer and tie with curling ribbon and you can add a rose or flower int the middle then you add a tag with this on it. This is a very special gift That you can never see The reason its so special is Its just for you from me If ever you are lonely, Or even feeling blue, you only have to hold this gift To knoe I thin of you You never can unerap it, Please leave the ribbon tied,Just hold the box close to you heart Its filled with thanks and Love inside.

I hope this is helpful to someone its a relly cute idea, make one and you can embellish as you like

My engagemnt party is going to be about 135 people at the end of April. As center pieces we are using flower pots with balloons around it. They will be less expensive after Easter. As favors i am giving two candlesticks with beautiful wrapping and a tie that says "What a pair." I got the idea online but it had a candle of a pear with the tie around it. I couldn't get enough pear candles so i modified it a bit. I am also giving out Hershey's candy bars. The wrapper will be our names and the wedding date. With a corney little saying like "They are so sweet!" Home these ideas are helpful.

My engagemnt party is going to be about 135 people at the end of April. As center pieces we are using flower pots with balloons around it. They will be less expensive after Easter. As favors i am giving two candlesticks with beautiful wrapping and a tie that says "What a pair." I got the idea online but it had a candle of a pear with the tie around it. I couldn't get enough pear candles so i modified it a bit. I am also giving out Hershey's candy bars. The wrapper will be our names and the wedding date. With a corney little saying like "They are so sweet!" Home these ideas are helpful.

My parents are throwing my fiance and I an engagement party in the beginning of April. I am going to put save the date magnets in an envelope and use them as favors and as placecards. I thought that would be a great idea! I got my save the date magnets from the Favor Lady (www.favorlady.com). She was great....quick and affordable. They came out so great! I love them.

We are using magnets for our save the date too! We made them ourselve's for about $30 for 150. I thought of it when I was sitting in traffic one day, looking at the back of a car that had one of those "support the troops" ribbons on it. I thought that would be a good way for people to not loose the save the date notices. We also incuded the link to our wedding web site on it, the web site has all the information on it for our big day. Does anyone else have a wedding web site? Ours is on The Knot. It is free, and you can update it any time you want. You can even have your guests RSVP to your wedding right on your site. You can post pics and your registry too. www.theknot.com

I am getting married in November and the area that we are having the reception at charges per person. We don't want alot of children there but don't know a polite way to exclude the kids from the ceremony. If you have any ideas of a polite way to put this on our invitations please let me know. Thank You

i am throwing my son and his bride to an engagement party. they wanted to get married at the beach but wont beable to too many familt to travel so far. so i thought i would surprze the with bring the beach to them. all guest are asked to come in hawian shirts and dresses there will be a loads of sand brought in and a live band. i really want this to be special because the brides mother decided she wants no part in it.. ooh well it is her loss.. i want this to be bigger that the reciption incase her mom changes her mind .. Hope this is a good idea what do you think.. we will serve all kinds of finger foods lots of fruit and smoke bbq out on the grill do you think i am over doing it a little ??? please if you have any other idea let me know.. thank you ilove your web site..

i am throwing an engagement party for my sister and her fiance. there will be about 50 of their closests friends and family. It is going to start at six and were having finger foods. I am clueless about what an engagment party is about. Both of the families know each other so the initial "icebreaker" thing is out of the question. Can you please give me some ideas on how to make it as cost effective and entertaing as possible. thanks for your help. kmooyman78@aol.com

for our engagement party, my fiance and i have invited 30 of our closest family and friends to sunday brunch at a local inn. it's not going to be a big production number (no favors, no dj, no games), but it should be hilarious (knowing my family and friends). i'm looking forward to hanging out with our bridal party, drinking some mimosas, and taking advice from family members. on the subject of gifts: while it isn't the point of throwing the shindig (the shindig is the point of the shindig in my book) well-meaning family members have been asking my mother where we're registered. they are looking for direction even though they have been told repeatedly that gifts aren't necessary. in a situation such as this, i think it's okay to register for some small stuff (as long as you don't go overboard, put it on your invites, or tell everyone you know). as long as you don't open gifts in front of guests and show true gratitude, then i don't think receiving gifts or registering for a few items is a huge deal. just my two cents :)

I'm seriously thinking when the day comes to be married, to just simply do the unepected. I'm already 42, lived in the jungle for 10 years as a missionary,etc. I'm thinking when the right one comes we won't be waiting a year or so to plan for things, but we will be ready to go forward with life. Anyone have fun ideas or have heard of an engagment party and surprise wedding at the sametime? I think I've heard of something similar, but then again I've just returned to the states! I'm definitely not going to be into all the glamour of a huge epensive wedding...it's the marriage that really counts.

Well I've answered my own question above and looked online under "surprise weddings"! You can still give me your thoughts and the fact that I can't seem to press the X key for unexpected and expensive means nothing! May you all have a great celebration be it at the engagement party or the wedding itself!

You all are soooo creative! My best friend just got engaged and I can't wait to start planning her engagement party. I NEED SOME HELP THOUGH!! Her degree is in Graphic Design and she's always got the greatest ideas. I was hoping to make an invitation to the party that would be personal to her and her beau - any ideas for a classy yet simple invitation that she will adore???? Thanks and congrats to you all!!!!

This has given me some GREAT ideas! My best friend got engaged in December, just days before her mother passed away. I am throwing an egagement party for her and have invited about 50 of their friends (so a good young group- mostly married late 20's/early 30's) as well as her sister and husband and the groom's parents. (Mine will be there as well for them to hang out with.) I am having it at my boyfriends house which is a cabin on 4 acres. My friend knows very little detail, other than we are doing beer and pork bbq and we made the party an "entertainment" party so that guests can bring something for them to entertain with! I have had kuzzies made (to put the beers in!) that are lime green with hot pink writing that says Cheers to (and then their names). I wish i had thought of the wedding date! Her colors are pink and green and she is obsessed with monogramming so I am having a great baker I know make a bunch of cupcakes (found a GREAT cupcake tree to hold them) with white icing with her new initials on them - some in pink and some in green. I like the idea of blowing up a picture of them, also having people write comments/advice/well wishes on something (may try to get monogrammed notecards for that). I also have a polaroid camera and thought people could take pics throughout the evening and then i could make her an album later with those pictures and the comments spread throughout. Do you guys have ANY ideas on how to incorporate a poster sized picture and anything else? I feel like I have a good theme started but need help tieing it all together! Oh, there are decks on the front and back of house and just not sure WHERE i should try to keep people (in or out/ on decks or the lawn). Still trying to figure out how i could get music to play in ALL areas! Sorry so long - but any advice would be fantastic. Thanks P.S. I am having this at 4pm on a Saturday in April so that it doesn't seem a "late night" affair and don't have to worry about people from out of town staying over.

This has given me some GREAT ideas! My best friend got engaged in December, just days before her mother passed away. I am throwing an egagement party for her and have invited about 50 of their friends (so a good young group- mostly married late 20's/early 30's) as well as her sister and husband and the groom's parents. (Mine will be there as well for them to hang out with.) I am having it at my boyfriends house which is a cabin on 4 acres. My friend knows very little detail, other than we are doing beer and pork bbq and we made the party an "entertainment" party so that guests can bring something for them to entertain with! I have had kuzzies made (to put the beers in!) that are lime green with hot pink writing that says Cheers to (and then their names). I wish i had thought of the wedding date! Her colors are pink and green and she is obsessed with monogramming so I am having a great baker I know make a bunch of cupcakes (found a GREAT cupcake tree to hold them) with white icing with her new initials on them - some in pink and some in green. I like the idea of blowing up a picture of them, also having people write comments/advice/well wishes on something (may try to get monogrammed notecards for that). I also have a polaroid camera and thought people could take pics throughout the evening and then i could make her an album later with those pictures and the comments spread throughout. Do you guys have ANY ideas on how to incorporate a poster sized picture and anything else? I feel like I have a good theme started but need help tieing it all together! Oh, there are decks on the front and back of house and just not sure WHERE i should try to keep people (in or out/ on decks or the lawn). Still trying to figure out how i could get music to play in ALL areas! Sorry so long - but any advice would be fantastic. Thanks P.S. I am having this at 4pm on a Saturday in April so that it doesn't seem a "late night" affair and don't have to worry about people from out of town staying over.

This has given me some GREAT ideas! My best friend got engaged in December, just days before her mother passed away. I am throwing an egagement party for her and have invited about 50 of their friends (so a good young group- mostly married late 20's/early 30's) as well as her sister and husband and the groom's parents. (Mine will be there as well for them to hang out with.) I am having it at my boyfriends house which is a cabin on 4 acres. My friend knows very little detail, other than we are doing beer and pork bbq and we made the party an "entertainment" party so that guests can bring something for them to entertain with! I have had kuzzies made (to put the beers in!) that are lime green with hot pink writing that says Cheers to (and then their names). I wish i had thought of the wedding date! Her colors are pink and green and she is obsessed with monogramming so I am having a great baker I know make a bunch of cupcakes (found a GREAT cupcake tree to hold them) with white icing with her new initials on them - some in pink and some in green. I like the idea of blowing up a picture of them, also having people write comments/advice/well wishes on something (may try to get monogrammed notecards for that). I also have a polaroid camera and thought people could take pics throughout the evening and then i could make her an album later with those pictures and the comments spread throughout. Do you guys have ANY ideas on how to incorporate a poster sized picture and anything else? I feel like I have a good theme started but need help tieing it all together! Oh, there are decks on the front and back of house and just not sure WHERE i should try to keep people (in or out/ on decks or the lawn). Still trying to figure out how i could get music to play in ALL areas! Sorry so long - but any advice would be fantastic. Thanks P.S. I am having this at 4pm on a Saturday in April so that it doesn't seem a "late night" affair and don't have to worry about people from out of town staying over.

Melissa S.~ For my engagement invitations my dad scanned a picture of my ring, it was taken right after my fiance' proposed. He enlarged it and made it black and white. Then we bought velum, you can buy any craft store, and wrote all the info of the party on it. Then we tied the velum and the picture with a satin bow at the top. With the velum on top of the picture you could see the picture through it. The picture and velum were 1/2 of a regular size sheet of paper. We also stuck a small RSVP card in it, because it is much easier to keep track of who is coming and who isn't. We told everyone, on the invite, no gifts. But we got tons of gifts. We felt so guilty. We just wanted to announce to everyone our good news. And everyone wanted us to open their gifts, but we told everyone that we weren't expecting any gifts so we would do it later, but we were made to do it infront of everyone by all the guests. We didn't want to hurt peoples feelings so we did. We got things like dance lessons, bridal magazines and organizers for the big day, frames, cook books, money, and cards. I still feel really bad about it though, and it was a few months ago. We are also making our own wedding invitations, to save money. We are designing our momograms and printing it on card stock paper and then writing the formal invite over the monograms. Very simple and easy, then we will carry out the monograms through out the wedding day. Hope this helps!

What's the answer? Is it cash or gifts for an engagement Party? It's costing us over $120. per couple and that's the cheapest we could find in New York. The couple has now been asked where they're registered now that the invitations have been sent. They had hoped for cash gifts since they are not living together and have nowhere to store gifts. We are, afterall, giving a great dinner with live music and a D.J. (small price in comparison to hall and dinner.) //We tried Knights of Columbus and VFW; it was the same price as a regular hall. I think more is expected in New York.Should we register or will this encourage gifts, not cash.

I am throughing an engagement party for my only daughter and future son in-law, I didn't know that you did things for the engagement party! The ideas here are great!!! The couple took a picture of themselves with the ring pops in their mouths a few months ago, so the ring pop is a great idea for decorations! I love the idea about the black and white picture of the ring, but I think I will take a picture of my daughter's hand with the ring on her finger, and the whole theme can be rings! If anyone has any more good ideas for ring things that I can use they would be greatly appreciated!

My Fiancee and I are having an engagement party at my parent's house in a month. Informal, only about 30 people. His family is kind of shy so one idea I had to get people mingling is to make cards that have 5-6 things about each person on them but not their name. We will pass them out at the party when guests arrive and by the end of the party you have to guess who your card is describing. If you guess correct you get a prize..I was thinking simple things like a bottle of wine,a candle, picture frame etc. I thought this was a great idea, hope someone else can find this helpful !!!!

Amanda - Thank you sooo much for the ring engagement invitation idea! That is awesome. I got married in April last year and I know what you mean about all of the gifts. Even though you feel a bit guilty about all of them, isn't it a wonderful feeling to know that so many people care about the two of you! I remember not being able to express my gratitude for everything people did along the way. We must have sent out a million thank you cards. Anyway, thanks again for the idea and congratulations on your big day!! Sincere best wishes for a lifetime of happiness!

Susan - How wonderful that you've had the opportunity to have such an unique experience. I don't have any ideas for you but I just wanted to let you know that I totally agree with you about the marriage being the most important part. It's certainly easy to get wrapped up in the glamour of putting together a wedding. Best luck to you in creating a spectacular, unique wedding!

Mellissa S ~ I'm glad you liked my suggestion. I am in the middle of planning my wedding now but love to come back here to see what people have posted. It is not easy to plan this big event. I am going to school and working full time. I wanted everything to be really simple, the planning and the wedding. But its really hard to make it simple because there are soooo many details to think about. Also we got a low budget to work with, which is fine with us its just that everything now a days costs sooooo much. but we r, so far, $3000.00 under budget working with $13000.00 for everything. We just have to make everything and make deals with people. Its who ya know! We are getting married next year on Memorial weekend and it is going to be awhole weekend get-away for all the guests in our home town. Thankfully we know the people so we are getting to rent the entire resort for almost nothing. My point is to be resourceful and look around, don't tell people your budget then u might get a better deal on things, and don't be afraid to make things yourself.

This comment is for Jean and also for the grooms mother that was worried about asking people to pay for their own meals at the engagement party at the resteraunt; First of all Jean, I see where you are coming from and to many people get caught up in trying to outdo the last wedding they attended, BUT some peoples definition of special is very different than yours and you should reallly respect that. Some woman dream of this day since they were little. Anyways, for all your negativness, I am sure glad you are not related to me! It is hard to be in a relationship and make it last so I suggest to whoever you know........they surround themselves with positive, encouraging people instead of you. To the grooms mother, Do what you can afford and if people can't respect that, then they don't have to be included!

Great suggestions Ladies! I became engaged in December 2004 and my fiance wasn't available for a party until the summer, SO we are having our engagement party in July 2005 which is 6 months from when we got engaged. I think you should plan your egagement party when it is most convenient for you as a couple. The only reason you should hurry in having the EP is if you plan to get married sooner rather than later so that the EP, shower and bachelor parties aren't so close together. Instead of having a DJ we plan to hook up our iPod to their stereo system and play a playlist of background music. I also plan on having a cupcake tier (tier from www.cupcaketree.com) stacked with cupcakes with our initials and date of the wedding on top. My soon to be mother in law and my real father both want me to put no gifts please on the invitations. I think I will say no gifts expected, but print my wedding website address onthe invitation as well so that those who wish to still give gifts can do so through our registry. CONGRATS and happy planning.

I am sure I am not alone in saying I am scared! This is scarier than I thought it was going to be! I just got engaged 9 days ago and am freaking out! But I am trying to tackle one part at a time. That said the engagement party....I am so unsure of what to do. I am 26 yrs old I live with my sister and am currently in grad school. My mom died last June from Pancreatic cancer and my dad bailed when I was 4 yrs old. So, its just me from the brides side. I must say I am on a short budget.....ANY ideas would be wonderful.

Jessica S.... I too recently got engaged. Don't be scared - just take a breath and regroup. Take some time to enjoy being engaged before delving into party planning. Short on budget- well I think we can all relate :) When you are ready, make a list of close family and friends that you definitely want at the engagement party (dont go overboard). Then talk to your fiance about a venue -perhaps a restaurant you two frequent often. Go to a few places, price around - see what they offer, and then make a decision. Try to do a Sunday afternoon party - less expensive than Saturday evening.

Jessica S.... I too recently got engaged. Don't be scared - just take a breath and regroup. Take some time to enjoy being engaged before delving into party planning. Short on budget- well I think we can all relate :) When you are ready, make a list of close family and friends that you definitely want at the engagement party (dont go overboard). Then talk to your fiance about a venue -perhaps a restaurant you two frequent often. Go to a few places, price around - see what they offer, and then make a decision. Try to do a Sunday afternoon party - less expensive than Saturday evening.

Jessica S.... I too recently got engaged. Don't be scared - just take a breath and regroup. Take some time to enjoy being engaged before delving into party planning. Short on budget- well I think we can all relate :) When you are ready, make a list of close family and friends that you definitely want at the engagement party (dont go overboard). Then talk to your fiance about a venue -perhaps a restaurant you two frequent often. Go to a few places, price around - see what they offer, and then make a decision. Try to do a Sunday afternoon party - less expensive than Saturday evening.

I have been looking every where for a certain humor keep sake of my wedding that is to take place in january 2006. The item I am searching for is a BALL and CHAIN (like prisioners)so I can get them personalized with our name on one ball and our wedding date on the other. If anyone could help me out with this it would help me a great deal.My Email is gette74@msn.com, Thank YOU! Sincerly, Georgette

YEY I just got engaged and wanted to tell the world!!

I just want to say congraulations to all the brides to be, Last night my boyfriend propose to me:)and I feel like the luckest woman alive!!!

There is absolutely nothing tacky about the B & G to be, hosting their own engagement party. Both of my parents are extremely busy working, and are not of great health and my Fiance does not have a father,... to take the burden off them, we feel more comfortable throwing our own party with EXCITEMENT. its the year 2005! there are no rules to throwing a party. Its all common sense... Spend what you can afford. And dont try and impress 100 guests. Save that for the reception. The tradition of an engagement party is for both immediate families and the bridal party to come together and celebrate. Not your next door neighbour, dogs, aunties, uncles, cats, football coach and school teachers. You get the drift! If you go overboard, you will look like a FOOL with too much cash to burn!

My boyfriend and I have decided to throw a party in October to announce our engagement to our friends. We've decided to get engaged but we are going to spend some time getting to know each other's families first and moving in together before we make it official. We are going to pretend that the party is a house warming party and then surprise everyone once they get there. It will be only cocktails and finger food and we will be having it at our apartment as we have a huge terrace which will be perfect for a summer evening. Shona I agree with you 100% - in this day and age parents shouldn't be expected to pay for parties or even full weddings. If a couple is old enough to get married and share a life together - they should be able to arrange these things on their own. Its nice if the parents can help out but I don't think they should feel taht its their responsibility - that's soooo passe. Engagement parties should be fun! Ours will be strictly friends so that everyone is in the same age-group (roughly) and our friends can get to know eachother. Most family members would prefer something less noisy and crowded anyway. Congratualtions and Good luck everybody!!!!!!!!!

My daughter and her fiance are getting married in Oct. 2006. His mom and I are hosting the engagement party at the end of June of this year. I've read alot about etiquette and engagement parties; the purpose is for the families and close friends to meet, to introduce the members of the wedding party, and of course to make the "official" engagement announcement. We added "No gifts please" to the invitation, primarily because those attending will be invited to the showers and the wedding as well where gifts are expected. We have incorporated many of the ideas offered here, so thanks to all of you. We're keeping the affair very simple; in our home, 30-40 guests, finger sandwiches, champagne toast by my husband (but also open to others who wish to offer their blessings), cake, balloons, personalized M&M's, save-the-date magnets, etc. Hope this helps, and best wishes and much happiness to all the brides and grooms!

I AM THE MAID OF HONOR IN MY SISTERS WEDDING. THE ENGAGEMNET PARTY IS AT THE END OF JUNE AT A REALY FANCY CATEREERS, WHICH WAS SUGGESTED BY THE MOTHER IN LAW TO BE SINCE THEY HAVE MONEY. MY SISTER HAS NO IDEA ON WHEN SHE WANTS TO GET GET MARRIED BUT IS SHOOTING FOR A SEPT. 2006 WEDDING. IS IT OK TO PUT sEPT 2006 ON THE SAVE THE DATE CARDS OR SHOULD IT BE THE EXACT DATE. I ALSO WOULD LIKE SOME IDEAS AS FAR AS FAVORS (NICE BUT CHEAP) THE GROOM'S FAMILY IS RICH AND MY SISTER WANTS TO IMPRESS THEM, BUT MY FAMILY DOESNT REALLY HAVE THE MONEY.

I got engaged two weeks ago on our two year anniversary. He gave me the ring during a sunrise kayaking trip. (We met on a kayaking trip). We are artists and we want everything to reflect our artistic, creative, unique and fun view on life. Two days ago, in front of twenty family members, the groom's mother announced she has arranged the engagement party. The location is very inconvinient/far for me, my family and friends, the food is catered tubs of lasagne, salad and bottles of Budweiser/Coors (I had planned on morrocan/neuvo french food with cocktails and wine), decorations are not my style at all, etc. She is spending lots of money on this and will not accept any input from me or the groom. She has already picked a date, but my mother will be vacationing in Europe then. She never bothered to ask. I am worried that she will next arrange the wedding, without our input. The groom says he loves his family and feels she is being generous. Am I over-reacting? Should I just be thankful of her generousity and go along? Any ideas on how to salvage my engagement party? Or just show up (without family and friends) and smile?

I just got engaged a week ago can't still quite beleive it. We want to enjoy this time of letting family and friends know but my family are already planning the engagement party for 6 weeks time. We haven't even decided on a wedding date, it just becoming a blur. I am really happy both families are over the moon but I can't even think straight at the moment. I am a profressional wedding planner and have planned hundreds of weddings but it is totally different when it comes to your own, everyone expects this amazing engagement party and wedding because of my business, but at the moment I just want to run and hide and take in the moment. Some positive advice would be great

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My boyfriend and I are wanting to throw an "engagement party" for our immediate family and closest friends, about 30 people max. We are renting 6 2 bdrm condos at the lake and are inviting them. We do not even have an engagement ring. We are going to throw a surprise wedding for ourselves. No fuss from others. They won't know until they show up the morning after check-in for an "engagement" brunch. We are spending most of our budget on getting our families together and paying for their lodging. We want a breakfast style brunch with a angelfood cake w/strawberries and whipped cream. Any ideas on how to accomplish this or menu or anything would be greatly appreciated. Thanks....T

I just got engaged to my boy three days ago. We are looking at having the engagement party in July. We aren't looking at having anything too fancy and we don't want to have a party at our house. We will probably have about 30 people attending. Does anyone have any ideas for a reasonably priced, intimate but fun setting?

Monica, I would not even show up. It is your celebration, not hers. Put your foot down now, you have alot of years ahead of you with this woman...

Here are some ideas: My fiance and I are having our engagement party two days from now at my parents house. They live out in the country and have a nice yard with a creek. they also have a screened in porch, a deck, an awesome grill, and hot -tub. So we thought it would be a perfect place to have an indoor/outdoor celebration / party! For fun I'm putting in a horse shoe pit...it's super easy to do. (Just buy a little sand, 4X4's, and a horse shoe kit from bi mart for $12. ) I'm also setting up a net to play volley ball and/or badmitton. We're getting some balloons and going to put them at the mailbox to help the guests find the place. We're going to play all kinds of music..some classical, rock, country, reggae. you name it. We'll have a microphone hooked up for announcements and toasts and karoke if anybody dares. speakers inside and out. Lots of wine, beer, etc. Thought about a keg but passed up the idea. and a lot of great food. We have lots of flowers to decorate the place up but passed on streamers, ruffled paper and stuff as it seems tacky. I also bought some teeche sp? torches for when it get's dark. My friend is bringing his nice poker chip set for later in the evening--it;s such a popular game to play now I think a lot of people will pitch in $5 or $ 10 for a nice size game but nothing to serious. What else? Lots of coolers with ice for drinks, umbrellas for rain and or shade. And ,oh yeah, pumped up the tires on some old bikes so that the kids or anybody can go on a ride if they want to escaoe th ecrowd for a little bit. the highlight of th enight will be centered around the food and a CHAMPAIGNE TOAST. So we have lots of Champaigne. I may also place the ring on my fiancee's finger in front of everybody but maybe not she might get to embarrrased. Well hope some of these ideas help.

I just got engaged a week ago and am planning a double engagement party with my soon to be sister in law. It is going to be a very casual summer Luau by the pool and on the lake. Any ideas how to word the invitations for a Double Engagement Party???

Our engagemnt party was a hit!! Other things we included in our party that I don't think I mentioned in my recent submition :

We bought some very cool and festive lights and hung them up outside. We had it catered and hired a few people to help serve so my parents could enjoy the party. We had a Piniata sp? for the children. We set up music speakers outside...a big bonus for getting people to enjoy themselves outside and to participate in some of the fun yard games we had. We bought fireworks!!!! (legal of course but still fun) unfortunatly in all the excitement we forgot to set them off! The biggest and best part was the champaigne toast which took a lot of planning since it was to involve all 40+ plus people at the party. That meant 40+ champaigne glasses!! And someone who could talk in front of a crowd without going into vapor lock! it was well worth it. My uncle Charlie (the best story teller and toughest son of a bitch I've ever known) started off the toast-to my grand parents because it was also there 69th wedding anniversary!! He did it by telling a short but moving and funny story about when and how they met, and how if it wasn't for there union none of us would have been there. Then he told of how I met Jane--and how I knew she was a keeper and that that's what everybody is trying to find these days. etc. etc. you get the idea...but it was so magical! And then I announced a toast in recognition of Jane's brother for graduating college the week prior, and then for my best man, who was there with his new fiancee, and there recent engagement and so then we all finally lifted our champaigne glasses and toasted at once. Anyway the idea was to include guest into our celebration and it was a very passionate moment for everyone there. This was simple and beautiful ( a great combination). At the end of the party it was just us and some of our close friends--we shared stories, played some personalized JENGA which is a lot of fun, and got a little silly. Hope this gives somebody out there an idea or two.

Jace

Monica... I have to agree with Fran. You need to put your foot down now. Before you confront her though you need to speak to you fiance and get him to understand how you feel. Its important that you are in agreement when it comes to these issues. Also point out that neither one of them is respecting your wishes or opinion and while you appreciate the gesture - you would rather plan your own engagement party. Whatever you do... don't invite your friends and family to it!

I was just reading through everything thats been written so far on this page and it made me giggle. I mean, obviously we all want to please our guests and make sure that everything we do or plan is in good taste and proper etiquette... BUT these things are all relative. I do not live in the USA but I am familiar with the way things are done there. I am Greek and where I live it is impossible to have intimate gatherings. Families are huge and friends of the family are even move. An average wedding guest list here is about 2000 people. Almost all guest bring cash gifts. Slowly things are starting to change as couples try to shorten guest lists (the guests are usually friends of the parents - not of the couple) but it will take at least another decade before we see a wedding guest list of 200 or even 300 people. What I am trying to say is - don't get caught up in how things "should be done". Try to please the people who are close to you and important to you and don't worry so much about the rest. Remember this is about you and your fiance so don't let anyone spoil it for you by making you stressed out with dos and donts. Once again... good luck to all!

I am hosting an engagement party for very a close family friend. The idea is to have fun!! I do not want to have guests feel l ike oh no another present- I would love to find the right wording to have people contribute to a fun getawayfor the couple. What do you think? Times are so different that old time ettiquette just doesn't seem to work yet I don't want it to appear pushy or tacky! Also want to distinquish this joyous celebratiuon froma shower!! You input please!!!!

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This may seem wired but my fututre-husband-to-be is currently in-carserated and will soon be getting out (no big deal- just in for for months)My question is can I have a engagement party and welcome home party at the same time? I really like some of the themes that people has put up on here so i was thinking of maybe doing a party at the bar we goto and haveing like a "Bar Theme"? Also, is it okay just to call people to invite them? And also, is it ok for my mom to bring her husband if he doesnt get along good with my real dad?

Thanks!!!@!

This is four Jolene. I think you can definitly have a welcome home and engagement party at the same time. Havening a bar theme is good too - especally if you are having it at a bar. Probly you can just call people to invite them, but that seems kinda lazy. Maybe you can leave a 40 on everyones portch with a note to tell them where to be and when. That way they can pre-party! I would definitly NOT tell your mom to invite her husband if your real pops will be there. It would not be very classy if they got in a bar fight at your party.

This is four Jolene. I think you can definitly have a welcome home and engagement party at the same time. Havening a bar theme is good too - especally if you are having it at a bar. Probly you can just call people to invite them, but that seems kinda lazy. Maybe you can leave a 40 on everyones portch with a note to tell them where to be and when. That way they can pre-party! I would definitly NOT tell your mom to invite her husband if your real pops will be there. It would not be very classy if they got in a bar fight at your party.

This is four Jolene. I think you can definitly have a welcome home and engagement party at the same time. Havening a bar theme is good too - especally if you are having it at a bar. Probly you can just call people to invite them, but that seems kinda lazy. Maybe you can leave a 40 on everyones portch with a note to tell them where to be and when. That way they can pre-party! I would definitly NOT tell your mom to invite her husband if your real pops will be there. It would not be very classy if they got in a bar fight at your party.

This may seem wired but my fututre-husband-to-be is currently in-carserated and will soon be getting out (no big deal- just in for for months)My question is can I have a engagement party and welcome home party at the same time? I really like some of the themes that people has put up on here so i was thinking of maybe doing a party at the bar we goto and haveing like a "Bar Theme"? Also, is it okay just to call people to invite them? And also, is it ok for my mom to bring her husband if he doesnt get along good with my real dad?

Thanks!!!@!

This may seem wired but my fututre-husband-to-be is currently in-carserated and will soon be getting out (no big deal- just in for for months)My question is can I have a engagement party and welcome home party at the same time? I really like some of the themes that people has put up on here so i was thinking of maybe doing a party at the bar we goto and haveing like a "Bar Theme"? Also, is it okay just to call people to invite them? And also, is it ok for my mom to bring her husband if he doesnt get along good with my real dad?

Thanks!!!@!

Does anyone have ideas on a Mexican theme? My son gave his girlfriend a diamond in Cancun, we have a limited budget and small area to work with. Maybe a outside..... Thanks

My name is: Misty and I just woundering if you ldon't mind about Engagement Party List for me and My fiance'e "KeKoa MaClean" ?

Hi, I am British and I have been looking for ideas for my Engagement Party everywhere. I am so glad I found this site as you girls have some wonderful ideas. Here are a few of my idea's. I have purchased little organza bags and put gold heart shaped chocolates inside them ,with a few gold sparkly sprinkles I tried a few colours and decided that light colours look the best ie.white,cream,pink etc.I have attached little white tags that have our wedding date on them. They look lovely. Being British we are having a garden party with tea,wine, and a selection of canapes and cakes before 5pm (both sets of parents are paying for this,we couldnt stop them lol). All my candles,napkins will be matching in colour and I am going to put English country garden flower in beautiful painted jugs.In the evening we are having an oriental buffet in the garden (that Scott and I are paying for) with music and fun stuff for the younger crowd.So we hope all generations will have a fun time ,as it is about family, love and having fun. My mom says it is often the details that are crucial to setting the scence. Dont let anyone tell you to keep it simple, if that is not your wish. Our families are with us 100% So we are going a little ott. Good luck girls and I hope you all have wonderful weddings xxxxx P.s I love you mom, thank you for you support.

We are having our engagement party next weekend. We invited parents, siblings, grandparents, godparents, and all of our attendents. The engagement party is being help at a local park with a swimming lake. We decided to go with a tiki theme, so i spent $35 on decorations- go to the dollar stores (the ones where everything actually costs $1). I got adorable plastic table cloths for $1 each! For center pieces, I got large clear votive candle holders from target (50 cents each!). I'm going to fill them with sand and put drink umbrellas in them to continue the beach feeling. We're going to have a table dedicated to us, with pictures from the last two years and a drawing we had done at a theme park. We're also going to have two poster boards for the guests to write down marriage advice on- one for the ladies, one for the men. We are also planning on posting these at the wedding reception. Food will be BBQ style. We're providing most of the food and drinks, but some family offered to help out, which is a relief. Hope some of these ideas help!

We are having an engagement party next weekend,although everyone thinks that they are coming to my 30th Birthday party .I am very nervous but sure it will be fun.

We have planned the party around a Morrocan theme so satin cushions on the floor ,glass lanterns and we have even hired a bellydancer.Cant wait to see my dads face .

I am getting married in Florida in December, and are having approx 25 guests join us from the UK. My fiancee and i are having trouble deciding what to do about throwing a party for all the guests who couldn't make it out to Florida when we get back. We want it to be a casual party and don't want to spend huge amounts of money seeing as by the time we get back we will be right on top of Xmas. We were thinking of doing a drinks only type event, but is it rude not to provide buffet/ snacks? Any ideas on a theme or venue would be most welcome!!

My boyfriend just proposed to me at Shenandoah Valley in Virginia after we trespassed into a beautiful lake after hours! =) The only problem is we are both different religions and from different cultures! I am from Pakistan and my parents want a Muslim wedding, while he is half-Caucasian half-Cuban and is of Methodist faith. I'm so nervous because I think I'll have to end up planning two different weddings!!! Plus I'm not sure who should pay for what because I feel it might be too much for my family if they have to pay for both events! My Pakistani style wedding might actually be back home in Pakistan! Any ideas, advice would be appreciated!!! :)

Shez, Try and combine the two religions into one ceremony. A large city like Baltimore is sure to have many wedding officiants to choose from, and many specialize in cross denominational ceremonies. Both your parents should understand that your marriage is going to be a fusion of your lives, backgrounds, families and, of course, religions, therefore, so should your wedding.

I just got engaged about a month ago and we are now planning the engagement party. We went through the list and it seemed to keep growing to over 50 people because we didn't want anyone to feel hurt by not being invited. So we decided to plan a very small immediate family dinner. With only his immediate family and my immediate family. I am excited because I feel that though it is small, only about 14 of us total, it is more personal. When there is a huge event the two families don't even get to really converse. This way we can spend a nice evening together and begin discussing the wedding. So, I don't think that brides out there have to worry or stress about the perfect engagement party. Remember that there is still showers, the rehearsal dinner, and the wedding. The point of the engagement party is for your families to meet- so it is okay to just keep it to only your immediate family. It will be more personal and you don't have to worry about hurt feelings. But, it is an only once in a lifetime event- so if you want a huge event by all means go for it! Just remember it is all about you and the groom and what would make you happiest! Good luck ladies, and don't stress- the key thing is that you and your soon to be hubby have a wonderful time (because it is about your union and not making everyone else happy)!

And I would love any ideas on having a small intimate engagement party. Either decorations or games or things we could do. Anything would be helpful. Thanks :)

Hi every one! My best friend is getting married on April 15th of next year. I am so excited for her and I've been asked to help put together her engagment party. She's been through so much and this time she found a really great guy and I want this day to be very special for them. And guess what... I HAVE NO IDEA'S. Any help???? E-mail me at caseylbryant@hotmail.com!!! Thanks A LOT!

Please tell me if you are invited to an engagement party should you expect to be invited to the wedding?

Shez,

Just like you I am going to get married back home, so we have decided to just have reception in the US instead of another wedding ceremony. So instead of spending on two weddings you can have one wedding and a nice lavish reception. As it is receptions are fairly expensive atleast $60-70 per head in nice waterfront hotel. Hope this helps.

In response to JW - no, just because you invite someone to the engagement party doesn't mean they expect to be invited to the wedding! Jarrod and I are having our engagement party next month and plan on hosting about 100-150 people, mostly friends and close family. Our thoughts are to then have family and close friends only at the wedding (approx 1/2 the no. of people at the cocktail party) Goodluck with your plans!